18

Considering

"Do you believe what she has said?" He rarely could look at me anymore, I felt like we were becoming more distant with every passing second.

"Possibly, why would he stop at Sitka, that is why you killing him is even more important now than ever." He clasped his hands tight into an arch placing them to the top of his head. "You still want to do this right?"

"Yes of course but only with the werewolf blood."

"Ok good, now you need to get some sleep."

"Henry." I whispered low as my lips pressed together.

"Yes." Somehow he knew what I was about to ask, as he shifted uncomfortably on his feet.

"Is what you said also true?" Inside I felt nervous to ask, but I needed to hear him say it again just to truly experience how I really felt about it.

"Why does it matter, earlier it was clear to see you had made your choice." His voice was humble, the hurt in his eyes ached me to my core.

"I was angry with you, when I learned what you had been doing to my mother, I wanted to hurt you, but Louis, he made me understand that you did it to keep her alive and I want to express my sincerest gratitude for that." I could taste the saltiness of my tears as my heart trembled as he stepped closer.

"I would never have done anything to hurt you or your family. God, believe me all I have ever wanted is to protect you. Every time I look at you, it hurts me to think of what could happen to you every single day. Do you know just how hard it is to not be able to watch you to make sure one of them was not touching a single hair on your body? I used to lay awake at night torturing myself with scenarios in my head about it." His hand slid over my cheek as he gently gripped my hair, his thumb wiping my tears. "But something today far outweighed that heartache, I felt something worse than death, the pain in my chest was excruciating, I wanted it to end." I looked up at him confused but mesmorised at the same time by his beauty "Seeing you and him together like that it broke me more than I ever knew possible. Do you know the restraint it took me not to rip him limb from limb, seeing him touching you in that way, it made my skin cruel." He retracted his hand as his jaw stiffened.

"Henry, I'm I'm sorry I didn't know you were there." My lips trembled as he laughed inwardly.

"It would have been ok if you didn't know I was there?" His head shook slightly as his eyes hooded, bringing his brooding to a whole other level.

"Of course that's not what I meant, listen to me." I gripped his wrist as he moaned inside, I couldn't help but think my touch made him uncomfortable. "You have to understand, I've never been in this position before. I've never had a single man want me in this way let alone two." I felt embarrassed for these words to even leave my lips.

"Then I think it's about time." He was serious as he now held my arms securely by my side.

"For what?"

"That you made a choice. I can't continue to not know what it is you truly want, what you need. I need you to decide me or him." The silence was deafening as my ears rang in panic. I wasn't ready for this, if I was being honest, I don't think I would ever be ready to choose between them both. I couldn't imagine ever not having either of them in my life.

"He's right, Eleanor, we can't continue this way." William stood in the doorway, his perfectly slicked back hair bar one strand that fell to his eyes. "It's not fair on any of us anymore." His gentle voice reminding me I had to do this, they were suffering, and it was because of me.