Miraadhya :The Royal Mistress

70 - Dream

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Rudraansh

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I throw the wine glass in my hand, my steps fumbling with all the alcohol in my system but my rage doesn't subside instead it just grows.

I hit the huge wall and a shooting pain vibrates through my arm which I actually welcome. It sure will swell in the morning but I am hardly giving two shits about it.

Raghav's eyes again flashes in my mind and it fills me with agony. I had promised my mother to always look after him but I failed her. He hates me.

I hear footsteps approaching and see Raghav stomping towards me.
He pushes me back with great strength and I stumble back feeling already light headed.

"How could you have done that to me? He was my father too! I deserved to know the truth!" He shouts and I see his eyes getting glossed with unshed tears.

I have never seen tears in those eyes before. Not also when our father died. But seeing them made my chest pain in a weird way- the pain that is similar to the one I had felt when Miraadhya had left me.

He pushes me again and my back hits the pillar behind. I let him push me, if it helps easing his frustration. I realise I have sobered up a bit when I don't see two Raghav scowling at me.

"I am sorry Raghav. "I say while stabiling myself.

"We got to know much later, Harshadip was already captured and then the truth of our father's history with Miraadhya's mother came up and it got a lot complicated."

"And you decided to pardon her ? Why?" He asked me in the eye demanding me to say the truth.

"I asked why?"

"Because she is my wife's mother. I didn't want her to loose her like I had lost Baba. I didn't wanted her to go through that pain." I confessed truthfully and I believed every single word. I had taken a decision emotionally not practically. Not a wise decision for being a King but I don't regret it.

I thought about it a lot, given the chance would I have made a different decision? And the answer was always no.

"We had lost Baba. I was his son too even though he hardly cared about me."

"He loved you Raghav." My voice turns louder both in shock and sadness that he had thought something like this.

"Ohh don't joke with me Dada. He always preferred you, his eyes always looked at you." His voice had turned so bitter that for a second I couldn't even recognise my own brother's voice.

"Aisa nai hai Raghav- Baba—"

"It's not like this Raghav- Baba—"

"I had heard him you know. I heard him saying that he couldn't even look at me because I reminded him of Maa. That some part of him blames me for her death." I look at him in shock as he gasps for air.

I walk towards him keeping an arm on his shoulder and at this moment I hated myself for not knowing about this, for not knowing how to comfort him. I am not good at this.

I never was until I had to comfort Miraadhya and somehow I was able to do that for her but not with my own brother.

Do I have a dual personality or something?

"Raghav -" My jaw tense up when he shoves my hand away.

"I want to go to Harikel. I will be staying there to look after the administration."