Tryst - Forbidden Hearts Series

3| No Sudden Movements

"How's she holding up?" Harper asked quietly.

I sighed and kept my eyes on Karma. She was sitting at the table talking to Jackson. "As good as can be expected, I guess. She still won't talk to me."

I watched as Jackson rubbed his hand up and down Karma's back and whispered something to hear something to her that I couldn't hear.

I wasn't jealous by the act. On the contrary, I was so ungrateful to him. I hated Karma going to the bar almost every night and getting drunk. I hated knowing that sometimes she would get so drunk that she would dance with other men. I was scared to death of the possibility of something happening to her.

What if someone spiked her drink? What if someone tried to take her home? Again? What if someone tried to take advantage of her?

Those were the questions that ran through my mind over and over again while I sat at home worrying. At first, when I found out she was at the bar, I would go there. That only caused more problems.

After one of the nights I crashed her solo party at the bar, we had gotten into an argument. She said she wanted to mourn her own way and that, if I showed up at the bar when she was there, she was going to start going somewhere else.

I wasn't in charge of her. I couldn't tell her what to do. All I could do was be there for her and pray to God that she got through this. After when the argument with Karma, I went to Jackson to ask for advice. That's when he suggested that I continue to let her come to Down the Rabbit Hole, and that way someone she knew would always be there and would be able to watch her.

So that's what we've been doing. At first, Karma would go there every night. That was until Ryan, Lanie, Ayden, and Harper wouldn't let her drink as much as she wanted. That's when she started going only on the nights Jackson worked. Like last night. Even though I still hated what she was doing, I trusted Jackson to make sure nothing happened to her.

But this was beginning to be too much. She was hardly eating. Barely talking. Jackson offered to help if it came down to it, and I was ready to call in that favor if I needed to. I was going to give her a couple more days before I tried talking to her again. We'll see how that goes and take it from there.

"How are you doing?" I asked Harper quietly.

She shrugged and brushed her long blonde hair over her shoulder. "It's rough, you know? I move Mrs. Fitzgerald. She was a second mother to all of us."

Yes, she was. The guilt I felt over her death ate at me every fucking day. I may not have been the cause, but if I had told Karma the truth about everything sooner, she may have patched things up with her mother and had more time to bond with her. Karma said she didn't blame me; but I did.

"I know what you mean." I whispered. When Harper sniffed, I handed her a tissue.

"Thanks."

With everything going on, I didn't want to pry into her personal life, but I noticed the heartbreaking way Harper looked at Jackson today.

"I know what you and I were never close like you and Lanie, but if you want to talk about it, I'm here."

She frowned at me and I nodded my head towards Jackson. Her face fell and I knew she made the connection.

"Did he tell you?"

I shook my head. "No he didn't. Its your eyes. I recognize the look. It was the same pain I saw in the mirror after I left Karma."

She looked back at Jackson. "I love him."

"I know you do." I loved Karma back then, too. So, I knew how it fucking felt to be apart from the one you loved.