Tryst - Forbidden Hearts Series

14| Walk of Shame

As I slowly regained consciousness, I couldn't help but smile. The amazing scent of Jackson's cologne invaded my nose. The amazing feel of his skin was pressed against mine as I laid on his chest.

The body aches that I was feeling in all right places were a reminder of the amazing night we shared. It felt so good to be back with Jackson. It felt beyond so right to be in our bed again. Together.

"I know the rules, princess. This is for one night -- and one night only. Unless things change between us, of course. But I'm hopeful. After all," Jackson leaned forward and put his mouth to my ear, "we made this deal once before, didn't we? And it didn't seem to stick."

And just like that, the reality of our situation came barreling down on me. My eyes opened wide and I glanced around at my surroundings. I was in a hotel room. With Jackson. This wasn't our bedroom. This wasn't our bed. And we weren't back together.

Suddenly, I remembered all too well when he joined me at the bar at Down the Rabbit Hole last night. I remembered dancing with him. I also remembered begging him to make love to me for the entire night -- as task that he fulfilled in every way imaginable.

I looked down at the man I was still hopelessly in love with. He was sleeping on his back, with his head turned in my direction. The relaxed expression on his face told me just how much he had been hurting lately -- and that obvious truth nearly shattered me.

Suddenly, I recalled the weary look in his eyes the few times that I've seen him since the breakup. I never missed the longing looks he cast my way when he thought I wasn't looking at him. The worst part of this was, if we didn't end up back together, we still would have to see each other occasionally.

Jackson was also close friends with my friends. Not to mention, he was Ryan's brother. The only way we probably wouldn't see each other was if--

"Oh, God. . ." I whispered as the horrible truth became clear. All of a sudden, I felt uncredibly sick to my stomach.

If he and I didn't get back together, I had the strong feeling he was going to move back to London. If not London, then somewhere where I wasn't. I'm not sure why that thought came to me out of nowhere, but gut instinct told me I was right.

What if that happened? What if he ended up moving away and I never saw him again? A sob caught in my throat and I glanced back down at him. Possibility of not seeing him or hearing his voice -- of him being on the other side of the world -- was a nightmare reality I didn't want to even think about.

I needed to figure things out. I needed to sort out whatever inner demons were keeping me from the most amazing man I had ever met. If I was going to lose Jackson Reese forever, it wasn't going to be because I didn't give it my all.

Before I could put any more thought into 'what could be', I needed to think about right now. As in. . . I needed to get the fuck out of here. If Jackson woke up while I was here, neither one of us was going to leave this hotel room today. I knew the truth with every fiber of my being. And Id that happened, I had a feeling he was going to be moving back home by the end of the night.

I very slowly and carefully slid off of the bed and from under the covers. I took two steps before I heard Jackson mumble something in his sleep. I glanced over my shoulder. He turned over onto his stomach and exhaled a deep breath. Thankfully, he didn't wake up.

I tiptoed around the room, randomly collecting my clothes that were strewn about from Jackson's impatience to get me naked last night. Once I had my panties, bra, and dress, I quietly slipped into the bathroom to make myself a little more decent.

After I was clothed, I checked my reflection in the mirror. This was the first time in days that I didn't have dark raccoon-like around my eyes. Maybe it was because whenever I slept without the man in the other room, I had a severe case of insomnia.