Maybe In Another Life

Chapter 9

I awoke from my sleep in a fit of screams and sweats. The image was running through my head. I kept replaying the accident. I watched Melanie fly out of the car. I watched my car tumble over a hill and down into a creek. I watched my mother's hair lap over her face as the blood stained her skin. The image kept replaying in my mind through nightmares and daydreams. As bad as it was, it wouldn't ever replace the image of discovering Melanie. I couldn't get rid of the picture in my head of her dangling from the ceiling. I pulled into the church parking lot after dark and made my way inside. My family wasn't ever the religious type, but after Melanie's death I found solace in saying a prayer. It seemed strange. I never picked up a book or took a class or anything of the sorts, which would've made me feel this way. It just seemed to truly make me feel at ease. I stayed in the building for hours, and eventually I fell asleep, right there on the church floor. I woke up when the sun was just beginning to rise. I felt groggy and my neck hurt, but I guess that's what happens when you sleep on hardwood. I walked through the exit and turned on my car and raced to my house. When I arrived, I ran inside. I threw on a random set of clothes and quickly raced back out to my car again. I pulled into the school parking lot. Today was the very last day I'd ever see this place, and I was a little sad. Throughout my entire time in school I had a family to go home to, and a bed to sleep in. Now, I had no family, and my nights were restless. I dragged my feet through the entrance. I trudged into the classroom and sat down. Mrs. Quentin wished everybody a good morning and took attendance before the bell rang. The day stretched on, and I was totally aloof. Everybody stared beads at me, almost in pity. Everybody knew what had happened in the last 9 months. How could they not? Most of it was headlined or on the news. Lindsay was by my side the entire day, but she never said a word to me. She clutched to my side, providing me with physical comfort. The bell to end the day rang, and everyone ran outside. Everyone except for me. I almost wanted to sit and wait for my sister to come racing to my side, or to yell a hi from the other end of the building. That never happened, and it never would again. I went home and fixed myself some food before hopping into the shower. You can't see tears under water, but I could surely feel them. The coolness was a stark contrast to the warmth of the water flowing from the showerhead. I turned off the water and dried myself. I made my way into my room and grabbed my graduation outfit. I put on my cap and gown and made my way to the school for a second time in my day. I walked into the ceremony room and waited. After my name was called, I walked up and received my piece of paper. It was so very bittersweet. I worked a very hard 18 years of my life for this, and the accomplishment felt amazing. I was proud of myself. I shook hands and walked back to where I sat. Maybe in another life, when I grabbed that paper, my family would have been able to cheer me on as I would have done for them.