Right But Wrong

Forests hold many secrets

I really needed to stop waking up so god damn early. You would think i would be sleeping more with the fact that i had just lost my mother and was in a new house, with people i could hardly remember but in all honesty it was difficult for me to get an ounce of sleep.

Although i was sure i wasn't completely depressed, which ended up surprising me even more, i still felt that i was acting in the wrong way. Was there a direct way i was to act? Was there a direct way for anyone to act when they were in a situation like this?

I'm sure society would have something to say about it. Society would probably say i wasn't grateful enough for my mother or i was supposed to cry more. But society always found a way to judge didn't they? I mean it wasn't my fault that i had only truly cried twice throughout this whole situation. Was it..?

Deciding to clear my mind I threw on a pair of leggings and a hoodie, with my trainers and grabbed my camera. I ran through the forest for a while, enjoying the cold on my skin and loving the nature around me. It was true that the nature was good for your mental health, it helped me to think without anyone disturbing me and helped me feel like I wasn't being judged every second.

I stopped by a lake, sitting in front of it and bringing out my camera. This view was something I didn't want to forget. Snapping a photo of the lake a soft smile appeared on my face, it looked beautiful with the trees and berries surrounding it and the sun glistening against it. Truthfully nature was the most beautiful thing on the planet, I just wished more people would appreciate it instead of taking it for granted like most did.

"Beautiful isn't it?" I heard a male voice, making me look up.

"What?" I asked, clearly I was way too drawn to the beauty of the nature that I hadn't properly recognised what the person had said.

"I said it's beautiful isn't it, the nature. The way the lake glistens against the sun, the feeling of freedom" he chuckled, sitting beside me.

"Yeah it is" I smiled a little "photos doesn't do it any justice"

"Your right on that part. I could never get enough of it" he continued. It felt strange that Cameron was being so friendly and actually having a conversation with me, maybe he didn't dislike me as much as I thought he did.

"My mum used to love the nature, said she felt like it was the only thing that truly listened to her at times" the feeling of his mum being mentioned felt even weirder, but i loved the way he mentioned her. The way he spoke about her made it seem like she was an angel who could do no wrong.

"Were you close to her?" I asked softly, curious about who made him smile so much.

"Very..it would be hard not to..she was the nicest woman anyone could meet, and the prettiest too. She would take cakes down to the local shop every morning and smile at everyone, it didn't matter who they were, they could be the worst person on the planet and mum would see some sort of goodness in them." His smile grew a little as he talked about her, it was like she was a gem he wanted no one to touch "she was too good for the world, mum was. The world destroyed her" his smile instantly faded.

"I'm sorry" I tried comforting him a little but it was like all the emotions that had rose up he instantly pushed back down again. Like he hated the thought of feeling anything, no matter what that emotion was, happiness, anger, sadness. Like emotions were a weakness instead of a normal part of human life.

"Hm" he refused to say anything more, standing up and leaving. Leaving me with the feeling of extreme guilt and the emotions society would say he was supposed to be feeling. Truthfully I didn't know if I hated him in that moment or if I wanted to burn the world to the ground with him.

"Don't beat yourself up about it" I heard a feminine voice "Cameron's like that, he'll tell you things like your the only person he trusts and then bottle everything back up again". Turning around I saw Angelica standing there, holding out her hand to me, which I shockingly took.

"Why?" I asked, now walking beside her as we went deeper into the forest.

"I don't know but I'm sure it must be something to do with his mental health. I mean no one comes out completely fine after something tragic happens do they?" She responded and I'm sure she was right.

"Anything happen to you?" For some reason I felt comfortable enough to ask, but worry consumed me a little at the thought that she would think I was some extremely rude person.

"Doesn't something happen to everyone? But to answer your question, dad left when I was 8, apparently he had some secret family or something, it completely destroyed mum and she started throwing herself into things. That was until she met your dad, she was drowning and he helped her swim again" she answered the question like it was an every day topic.

"I know you and him don't get along well, and I'm sure you have your reasons but he's not as much of a bastard as he puts out that he is. Under the surface there's something else, a man with actual emotion. If he's managed to show mum it then maybe if you give him a chance he can show you it too. Not that it's my place to say anything, but think about it" Maybe she was right, maybe I would think about it, I mean I would have to make something of living here right?

"I will, thank you Angelica" I smiled a little, maybe there was another person in this household I would be able to get along with after all.

"Elica" she corrected me "Angelica is what mum likes to call me but I prefer Elica, it's less rich and formal" truthfully the way she put it made me like her even more.

"Elica it is" this time I gave her a proper smile.

Finally we made it back to the cabin and I no longer felt as stressed as I did, thanks to my new stepsister.