"Gosh dammit, brat! " Cat squealed. "You're already fucking up my car by jumping up and down like a sugar high!!"
"Not my fault your dirt broke, cuhh!" Miku snarled whilst twerking her flat ass on the metal pole above the goofy ahh looking car.
"Ay yi yi, this kid got some nerve." Cat face-plammed, speeding 70 mph through a busy city
"Yeah, it's called the nervous system. Heard of him?" Miku smacked.
Cat annoyed, "I meant something else, you dingbat." He continued, "No wonder you got held back for 7 years."
"It's because I died in 2017, retard." Miku slurred. "And yk what? I have a comeback JUST FOR YOU, big sunny Jim."
"What the hell does that m-" Before Cat could finish his question, Miku jumped in squirrel position to the front of the car. She started playing Not Like US by Kendrick Lamar.
Miku sang in her robotic voice, "Certified lover boy? CERTIFIED PEDOPHILE!!! 🤓☝️ WOP WOP WOP WOP WOP DOT FUCK EM UP 🥵🤤 WOP WOP WOP WOP WOP IMA DO MY STUFF 🔥🔥🔥 WHY YOU TROLLIN LIKE A BITCH, AINT YOU TIRED 🎀🎀🎀 TRYNA STRIKE A CORD N IS PROLLY A MINORRRRRRRRRRRR 🦅🔫🦅🔫🦅🔫🦅🔫🦅🔫🦅🔫🦅🔫🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣" She started doing the griddy on all the control panels in the wacky vehicle.
"That felt targeted." Cat muttered to himself.
The poopy weirdos had a little stop-by at McDonald's. To be fair, they expected a normal visit, even though they had a very, very absurd tension on the way. The moment they walked in the building, they saw a butcher with the name tag of "Brina's fatass mom" chopping up a live cow.
"WHAT ON EARTH?!" Cat yelped, causing the employee's attention.
"Oh!" Miku gasped.
"Ah, shit!" Brina's mom shat her pants. She dropped the knives. She asked, "Can I help you?"
"Erm, can we have a couple cheeseburgers and a 20 piece McNuggets??? 🥺" Miku begged. "I'll help you chop up the cow if it's free."
"Can you put a side of a flurry on dat as well?" Cat ordered
"The ice cream machine is brocken, sorry sigmas." The lady rejected.
"Grimace Shake, then?" Cat suggested.
The hippopotamus replied, "Sure thing! Come help me out here you whore!" She was clearly talking about Miku.
Miku went into the kitchen and noticed the poor baby calf crying for dear life. Miku couldn't help, but tear up. Out of mid air, she pulled a needle and thread out of her ass and began stitching up the cow.
"There ya go!" Miku smiled.
"Thank you, nice drone!!" The cow suddenly spoke.
Miku jumped, "Woah, you can talk?!"
"Shhhh!" The calf shushed her. "Yes, but quiet down, moo."
"Sorry, sorry." Miku apologized. "What's your name, by the way?"
"I'm Milkshake. I WAS dating that foodie's daughter, along with a couple other brainrotted looksmaxxers, aka, faggots, but this bitchass took me away from them and tried to kill me...and possibly eat me...yk, like Caseoh??"
Miku gasped so dramatically that she almost fainted. She yelled, "NO WAY AM I LETTING THAT SLIDE! IM GONNA GIVE HER THE VENGENCE SHE DESERVES!"
"YEAH!!!!" Milkshake cheered. "You get'em, girly pop!!!! MOOOOOOO!!!!!!"
YOU ARE READING
CAT IN THE HAT (PSJK VERSION)
FanfictionMiku Hatsune was minding her own darn business once she ran home from her 46278282nd concert with her friends. She finds herself bored with a man dressed up as a furry at behind her front door. It's rather obvious what happens next. Good luck readin...
