Dream haunter (book 1 of the dream serious)

Overthinking

Bells pov

It's been what six months since Damon has died, and today I'm getting ready to leave for nationals. I asked my coach if I could be entered in all the swims that Damon was gonna do, to honor him.

As I'm packing my bag my phone goes off.

Jack: hey Bell, I know I have sent this a lot of times but I'm sorry,I never meant for any of this to happen,I didn't know that any of that could've happened, I was just scared that you and Damon would hate me after I bought back things from that past that I just needed to get away. Please forgive me and give me another chance to be your friend. I know that your getting ready to go to nationals right now, but just know that I'll be there, I'll be there watching you swim and cheering you on; I will be doing all this on behalf of Damon. I'm so happy that your gonna do all the swims he was going to do, all the swims that you hate. Bell I'm sorry and I just wanted to tell you that I love you, I love you so much. I don't love you as a friend I love you more than that, I have since the day we first started dating I'm sorry that I've caused so much shit to happen in your life. I don't expect you to reply.

After reading that message I didn't know what to do, I just left it as it was and continued with my packing. I was going through my swim shirts looking for one to wear on pool deck, when I found Damon's shirt, I took it and just wrapped it around myself. The next thing I knew was that I was breaking down into tears, I've never cried over and over again for the same person like I did with Damon. It just broke me to know that he was dead and I was still alive, I didn't want to believe that I was the one left alive but that was the case, I was left alive and alone and I hated it.

"Hey Bell can I borrow...... Oh shit come here." I hear Gabby say as she walks into my room

"I miss him Gabby, I know that it's meant to get better with time, but I can't do this. I can't go to this meet and act like everything is alright. It makes me sick that I have to swim without him, I need him there, I need him cheering me on. I need him to be the first face I see after my race, I need him to be the one that holds me and tells me good swim before giving me a kiss and telling me what I could improve on next time." I say balling my eyes out

"Bell I'm not going to tell you it's going to get better with time, or that you should do this meet. In my opinion I reckon it's best you stay at home, I'm not saying not to go to nationals, I'm just saying that your not emotionally stable to get back into your competitive state again as the older twin I feel like you should just wait this out, until you feel like your ready okay." Gabby says whilst embracing me in a hug

"I know Gabby, but the thing is I'm physically ready but not emotionally, but I want to do this." I tell her

"If you feel like you should do this meet, I'm not going to be the one that will stop you, you go and I'll be there in fact dad said that he's gonna be there, he's cancelling his business conference just to be there for you, he's gonna be there for you and this time he means it." Gabby says

"Really?" I ask feeling slightly better

"Yeah." She says

"Okay, I might get some rest and continue packing tomorrow." I tell Gabby

"Okay, good night Bell, if you need anything just text me, I'm in the room next door you as you know, but legit I don't want you to spend the night crying." She says

"Thanks Gabby, and good night. I love you." I say

"I love you too Bell." Gabby says before walking out

I go into my bathroom and get ready for bed, I wear Damon's deck shirt just so I can sleep with he's scent traveling through my body. I miss his touch and his scent so much. I fall asleep to the thoughts of Damon all the things we did and all our fights.

Skip till nationals

Today is the day nationals start, I'm so happy but at the same time upset this was meant to be the place where both me and Damon would shine but I'm doing it all by myself. As I get ready to go into marshaling I feel people watching me and whispering. I straight up knew what it was about but I chose to ignore it all and just make my way into marshaling, I was doing my best event and I wanted to focus on that. It was the 200m breaststroke I love this event so much. When I was younger I had a hatred towards this stroke but now its my favorite stroke.

I sit by myself in a corner in marshaling waiting for them to call my name and listen to my pump songs. I feel people looking at me and I snap

"WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? YOU KNOW IF YOU TAKE A PICTURE IT LASTS LONGER. AND I GET CAUSE MY BOYFRIEND WAS KILLED YOUR ALL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT IF IM OKAY, BUT PLEASE STOP WITH THIS BULLSHIT OF LOOKING AT ME AND TALKING SO MUCH SHIT." I snap at everyone

After that the room goes quite and they stop talking shit about me. I knew than that I had to give them something to talk about. I was going to kick ass, even if I had the 3rd fastest time I was going to set a new nationals record and if I can a new world record. I wasn't going to settle down for no ones shit I don't need people talking about me in the one place I feel at home if this already happens to me at school and in my own house.

Let's just say the race was a success I was ahead from the time we took off the blocks with a reaction time of 0.59. By the time we had reached the last 15m I was more than 5 body lengths ahead. I just really badly wanted to prove that I was able to do this. And when I finished my race I saw my dad, Jack, Gabby, Sofi and Martin sitting together and cheering me on like crazy. My dad was at my swim meet for the first time since mum died.

Flashback

"Mum, dad!" 10 year old me screams out "hurry up! I'm late for warm up I need to make it before they send in the results for who is swimming and who isn't." I say as I walk down the stairs chucking on my deck shirt.

"Okay, let's go guys." Dad says

"Okay, I'll meet you guys at the pool, I've got to pick Gabby, Martin and Jack up from tennis." Mum says. Martin and Gabby were tennis partners and Jack was always third wheeling. For some reason Jack never wanted to be partnered with me whenever I went to tennis and it hurt me a lot.

When we get to the pool warm up was just starting and I go and warm up. After doing my warm up I quickly run to the bathroom with my bestfriend Emily and fix up my skins. Emily and I have been bestfriends for a while, she's the only girl that gets me and it's kind of how we click. Plus she's the only one that's willing to sleepover at mine and get up early the next morning because of my swim practice. I feel like it's cause maybe she also swims but that's highly irrelevant.

I run out and get ready for my race, I was swimming the 200m breaststroke for the first time in my life and I was so scared. I get up on the block and wait for the starter to say "take you marks" hearing those three words I take my marks and wait for the buzzer once that goes off I jump in. I end up taking the lead after the first 50, I end up pushing myself to go faster and I end up winning the race. I was entered with the slowest time and finished with the fastest time of the whole meet. I set records for not only my clubs but for the country, and I was so happy. When I had finished my race I looked up to the stands to find, Jack, Gabby, Martin and my parents looking so pleased with my swim. I was so happy to see that Jack and my dad were pleased because I was trying to get their attention after all.

End flashback

I then realise that this is all dejàvu, except this time my mum isn't here. I look up and see that Jack wasn't there anymore but in fact standing in front of my, before I can say anything he kisses me. I was so happy but angry at the same time. I found myself not pulling away from the kiss but pulling in to deepen it.

Au notes

Lmao hey guys, I'm sorry to say but this book has come to an end. If you guys want a second book to this just DM me. There's going to be an epilogue to this as well as an alternate chapter considering I really shipped bellom more than beck. Lmao yes I did make the cringest ship names for them but you know what I don't care!!!

Remember to stay tuned for the epilogue and alternate chapter

Love you all xoxox Vari