echoes of defiance (Rewriting)

chapter 35

As I stepped through the door of the penthouse, I felt the weight of exhaustion pressing down on me. Mom had sent me home, noticing how worn out I was from the hospital. "Go home, get some sleep, and eat something," she said, her voice gentle but firm. She assured me Amma was getting better, but she didn’t know the storm brewing inside me.

Ya Usman had walked with me to the building's entrance before heading back. I managed to offer a weak smile as he left, but my heart was heavy. My body moved on autopilot as I entered, muttering a prayer under my breath before heading straight to the kitchen to make some tea. But even that was too much for me. My head pounded with each thought, each memory I tried to push away. Frustrated, I abandoned the tea and stumbled toward the bathroom, still wearing my home clothes.

Turning on the shower, I stepped in, not caring that my clothes clung to me as water soaked through. In an instant, the sob I had been holding back all day tore from my chest. The tears streamed down my face, blending with the water, and I collapsed against the wall, feeling utterly broken. I don’t know how long I stood there, but my knees felt weak, and my body trembled.

Something felt off. There was a presence—someone else in the house. My heart stuttered as I tried to recall if I had locked the door when I entered. Panic coursed through me, but my body felt too weak to react. Slowly, I turned off the shower, my mind spinning from exhaustion and worry, and stepped out of the bathroom.

And then I saw him.

Zain stood there, watching me, his expression unreadable. My breath caught in my throat as shock and confusion washed over me. Without thinking, I foolishly turned around and retreated back into the bathroom, using every ounce of strength left in my fragile body. He followed, his footsteps quick, his presence relentless.

“Don’t touch me!” My voice came out weak, shaky, and full of hurt.

He froze, his eyes wide with concern and pain.

"I can't believe you went to get married..." The words tumbled out, choked with sobs, my voice barely above a whisper. “I-I can't even begin to accept that you'd be with someone else. My heart… it’s breaking. I just want to go home.”

I collapsed into a loud cry, my hands clutching at my wet hair as though it could somehow hold me together. My chest heaved, my body shaking with each sob, as the overwhelming weight of it all hit me like a tidal wave.

Zain stepped closer, but I moved back instinctively, shaking my head. His eyes softened, his voice low, almost pleading. "Baby, I can't believe you even thought that. Don’t you know me by now? Don’t you know how much I love you? How could you ever think I’d marry someone else without telling you? Is that what you really think of me?"

The sadness in his eyes, the disappointment in his voice, cut through me like a blade. My heart ached as I fought back more tears, feeling my strength fading.

"You’ve been on the phone, secretive for days. What was I supposed to think? I'm not a mind reader, Zain. Do you think I wanted to believe it? The news was everywhere, the day before you left, and you told me not to look at the internet. What was I supposed to do?”

I felt weaker, the sobs wracking my body as I cried. Zain exhaled slowly, as if trying to release the tension in the air between us.

“I will explain everything, I swear. But let’s get you changed first, please.” His tone was soft, but there was a desperation in his words, and he moved closer again, his hands outstretched, but I stepped back once more.

"Are you married to her or not?" My voice broke as I asked the question that had haunted me for days. “Please don’t touch me if you are. I’ll go to my parents instead of sharing you with someone else. You’re mine. You said you were mine and mine alone. What is this? I can’t… I won’t share you. I’d rather die than know you’re touching another woman.”

At that moment, I saw it. A smile tugged at his lips.

I gasped, glaring at him through my tears. “You’re smiling?” I asked, my voice high-pitched, as I began to sob again, this time like a child throwing a tantrum. The way I used to cry to Amma when I was sad. I couldn't control it.

Zain’s smile grew as he shook his head, his voice softening. “So, you love me that much, huh? This Arab boy has truly captured the heart of this Yerwa girl,” he teased, letting out a small laugh.

I frowned, still upset, still broken.

He pulled out his phone and held it up, showing me the screen. “Look, the wedding has been postponed. I swear, I didn’t even know about it. And the second I found out, I ran straight back to my wife. No wedding is happening, rigimammiyar Zain. I promise, I won’t keep things from you again.”

He stepped closer, his sincerity clear, but I still felt the pang of jealousy and hurt. “Did you see that Mahra girl?” I asked, my lips forming a teasing frown.

He groaned, running a hand over his face. “Ya Subhanallah, didn’t you miss me at all? The way your pout is killing me right now—if I don’t kiss you soon, I swear I might die.”

His words were playful, but his eyes burned with intensity. He closed the distance between us in one swift motion, lifting me into his arms despite my protests. I barely had time to react before he crushed his lips against mine, kissing me with a passion he hadn’t shown since our wedding.

My heart raced, pounding against my chest, as my mind chanted, Damn, I love this man. Over and over, the thought consumed me as I melted into the kiss.

After what felt like an eternity, Zain pulled away, breathless. His forehead rested against mine as he chuckled softly. “Damn, I need to get those contraceptives now, see what you caused?”

My stomach growled loudly, breaking the moment. I blinked, realizing I hadn’t eaten in nearly 30 hours. “I haven’t eaten in the last day and a half…” I admitted, my voice small.

His expression changed immediately, alarm flashing in his eyes. “What? And you let that happen?” He quickly stood and headed for the kitchen, muttering something under his breath. In less than ten minutes, he returned with tea and a steaming bowl of noodles.

“Eat.” His voice was firm, commanding, as he sat beside me on the bed and began feeding me.

Once I had eaten, we showered together,  and then prayed Asr side by side. As the peace of the prayer washed over me, I realized how deeply I loved him. Every tear, every smile, every laugh—it all led me back to him.