The Shut Up and Write Awards 2024 [CLOSED]

🧬 Fantasy and Sci-Fi (Round 1)

SilviaKrpatova A Kind of Magic
Through to the next round ✅

"The spelling and grammar here is very good. I didn't see any obvious errors or tense issues. I'd be careful with the word 'orb' although it's in the correct context instead of being used to describe eyes, it can become repetitive. It would be a good idea to think of another word you could use for a bit of variation. I haven't ever seen a King in a same sex relationship before and I can't help but wondering what title his partner should have. Should he be a prince? Or should they be equal Kings? There's so many questions and I hope I find the answers.

A tiny critique for you, I would like to know what your characters look like and what their thoughts and feelings are.

Also, have you considered bringing in chapter titles? I really think this could help bring your story to life a bit more. "

AprilJester The Morning Song
Sorry this book was eliminated ❌

"The prologue was confusing. The story starts with a dream (later revealed to be memories of another person). I had to read it twice to understand what's happening. The protagonist is awakened by the mother only to keep thinking of those memories/flashbacks. I thought it was weird that the flashback/dream ended only for the lead to keep thinking about the past and what happened after that particular flashback scene.

I can't say much about the lead as the prologue focused on her father and the first chapter was part of that writing challenge. So we learned a few things about her past but the rest of the chapter was written to accommodate the prompts rules. I would continue reading it for a couple more chapters to get a clearer view of what the story is about. I think it could work fine as a stand-alone work but I know each chapter has a theme to fit the prompt and that cuts the pace of narration. Chapters two and three were better, there was an actual plot and the characters were developed better."

Denyefa4 Just Add Witches
Through to the next round ✅

There are no obvious spelling errors here but there are a few grammatical ones. When you're writing numbers it's much better to write them out as letters, such as two instead of 2. I know keeping to the chosen tense can be difficult especially when you're focussed on writing the book, but I did see a couple that could be corrected. I wonder what's going to happen when your character starts his new life? I can relate to what's happening with him to lose a parent to cancer, especially a parent he didn't get on so well with. I would like to see his thoughts and his mixed emotions about losing his mum.

lupe6583v Royal Moon
Sorry this book has been eliminated ❌

The main characters in the story didn't quite captivate my interest. The female lead's focus on marrying the man she loves seemed to overshadow her depth as a character. Her youthful naivety and lack of awareness of potential danger made her seem immature, and I felt that more background on her upbringing and life in the castle would have provided better context for her behavior. The male lead, as portrayed through the female's perspective, fit the archetype of the strong yet cursed protagonist. His seemingly instant recognition of the female lead and their swift connection felt a bit rushed.

While the plot was straightforward, there were aspects that didn't resonate with me. The narrative seemed to heavily emphasize fate and the significance of every action, which at times felt overwhelming. Although I typically enjoy stories involving curses and the influence of fate, the abundance of references in this case felt excessive. I believe a more balanced approach, allowing readers to contemplate the unfolding events, would have been more effective.