Before The Stars Disappear [mxm]

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞

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Tonight's performance was flawless.

The way people screamed my name, reaching out as though I were something beyond human, as if a single touch could bring them to a world they could only dream of. My name's Vesper, a remarkable idol of today's latest music industry. I'm aware that it's mostly my appearance which captures everyone's attention. My ocean blue eyes, my dual-toned hair in the shades of pink and black, and my voice capable of reaching the highest notes an opera singer would envy.

However, away from the adoration and the noise, I felt nothing like the image I so effortlessly projected. My body craves rest but my mind's too full of thoughts.

The August wind clung to the night like a breath of something forgotten. Here I am, sitting with my legs drawn up against my chest. The brief moment of calm wasn't enough to quiet the storm inside me. As I sank onto the edge of the rooftop, the thoughts I had been desperately trying to bury came flooding back. I managed to hold them at bay while I was on stage, letting the performance take over. Though now that I'm alone, they hit me back with full force.

Daniel.

The name echoed in my mind, pulling me into the dark spiral that had been haunting me for weeks. The world again felt distant, cold and indifferent like the silence that had settled between us. My heart tightened and I blinked rapidly to chase away this burning feeling in my eyes.

Daniel.

The name felt foreign on my lips as if the person it belonged to had already become someone else's. I swear we were doing just fine before, especially last year when we got together. But in the last few months, during my birthday in August, something had shifted. He started drifting away from me, slowly turning into a stranger rather than a person who had once made me feel whole. I hate how he always prioritizes his friends over me, I hate how he always ignores my calls and messages.

All my friends keep telling me to break up with him, but I can't. Everyone said that I deserve someone better who's capable of loving and treating me right. Someone who cares about my need for affection. Hey, It's not as simple as it sounds. The thought of being alone again terrifies me. I don't know how to move on—nor I don't think I ever could.

I wanted it to be him, really

I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand, staring out into the endless sprawl of buildings below. Their windows glowed like eyes that judged me for being so weak. I have really bad attachment issues, and I hate it. My tears had dried hours ago, leaving my cheeks raw. My chest still ached with a hollow emptiness that words couldn't describe.

Why did it have to go this way? My birth month was supposed to be different... like it always had been. It should've marked the start of something special, a time when Daniel would pull me close, laugh with him, and hold me tight as if nothing else mattered. But this year, the month had simply gone unnoticed. Daniel got lost in whatever world he had built around himself. The messages came slower, and the phone calls were shorter to the point where we wouldn't be bothered to call each other any longer. Days passed into weeks, and weeks had turned into months.