Cradles | Alastor Angst

10

Hey. This chapter is a lot longer than usual, I felt like I owed you guys a bit more than usual because of the delay ;( Sorry abt that btw. Y'all are in for a fun chapter!!!

TW:

- Mentions of past Rape/Non-con(!)
- Panic attacks
- Self-harm
- AU/HC
- OOC Characters
- Suicidal idealisations.

!!!

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Nobody's POV

Alastor blinked as Angel shoved her off him just before the others came in. And by 'the others', I mean Husk, Charlie and Vaggie. That was good at least. Charlie looked worried, fidgeting nervously, Husk looked like he was trying to hide his concern with annoyance. And Vaggie looked guilty.

As she should.

She had trusted her. Alastor had let Vaggie see her at her worst, and she had decided to go and spill it to everyone. Alastor was tempted to rip off her arm right then and there- what was she thinking? Vaggie was her friend. Not foe.

She didn't even notice when Charlie sat next to her hesitantly, gaze still focused on Vaggie, who was avoiding eye contact. 'Hey Alastor.'

Alastor jumped, then sighed. 'Okay, I know what you're all here for, but need I remind you that it's my  body? My choice, right?' 

Who was she kidding? She knew that wasn't the truth. It was never her choice. The others were looking at her with concern, pity in their eyes. Pity.  For her, a cannibalistic cereal(:D) killer. Disgusting. She could feel their hot gazes wafting over her skin, boring into her deeper than the cuts on her wrist.

'...can I see?'

Alastor held out her arm, letting Charlie look at the bloodied bandages on her wrist. Charlie gently put her hand over her arm, making Alastor wince, about to pull away, then she sit up a bit straighter as a small amount of Angelic energy coursed through her veins. The long cut on her forearm knitted together, sealing closed, leaving only a faint scar.

Alastor grit her teeth as it travelled to her torso, mixing with the deep wound on her stomach and lower chest, causing white hot pain to flash through her body. She closed her eyes, sucking in a deep breath, which didn't go unnoticed.

'Are you okay?' Charlie said, placing a hand on her shoulder. She flinched away. 'Why of course deer.'

Charlie nodded and put her hands back in her lap. '...why did you do it?'

Alastor sighed, rubbing her temples. 'It goes into a bunch of stuff that I do not intend to tell you, so I'm afraid I cannot give you the answer to that question.'

'Oh Alastor... I just wish I could've helped-'

'Charlie. Whatever's wrong with me is not your fault at all. It is purely my problem, and whatever happens to me as a cause is my business.'

'No Alastor. Us caring involves us whether you like it or not.'

'But-'

'Charlie's right. We're all here for you Al.'

'...'

Alastor looked down, feeling a furry hand on her shoulder. She flinched away, choosing to ignore the hurt on Angel's face. She couldn't deal with this right now, not with so many people in such a small room.

'...thank you.' She considered her words, then after a moment added, 'That means more than you think.'

'Of course.'