A bend in space-time (Season 3) - The Umbrella Academy

Chapter 8: Psykronium dreams

Chronological markers: this scene fits in as a deleted scene from The Umbrella Academy, season 3, episode 2, around 44:20 (shortly before Klaus and Five return to Hotel Obsidian, on their return from Pennsylvania... while Luther is at Hargreeves Mansion with Sloane).

Suggested soundtrack: Apocalyptica/Metallica cover - One (And Justice for All) ; Carbon Based Lifeforms : Abiogenesis.

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April 3 2019, 09h25 pm

'Before judging your brother, you must walk several moons in his moccasins'. This is one of the quotes from the little book of Lakota wisdom found in the White Buffalo suite, which has haunted me since I left April Showers late in the afternoon, to wander along the sidewalks and shops of The City.

I had a long conversation with Granny. Forgive me, I find it hard not to call her that. I was able to grasp how much having to raise me with Mom had prevented her from living the life she would have wanted, and the one she now has here. I got a better understanding of her life as a costume designer, whose talent I can easily imagine. She invited me to attend the performance of 'Chicago' tomorrow at the Celestial Theatre. I don't know if I'll be able to go, as it's my trial day at work, but I was moved by the offer.

I only alluded again briefly to the subject of that grandchild she was never able to get close to, just like the one who should have been his mother. Christopher. I'm really confused at the moment. Maybe because I saw that bastard electrocute Diego by converting energy. Yes, that must have something to do with it. Or maybe because I felt him try to instill fear into Klaus's nervous system - directly through the energy of his brain - the same way he speaks directly into people's heads, and only audibly emits buzzing sounds.

Do you know what I did as I stepped back onto Crescent Boulevard, heading towards 7th Avenue, while my gaze lingered on the tattoo now adorning my arm? I felt an overwhelming urge to reclaim my identity once again, beyond the fresh haircut from this morning. This version of me knows how to more or less coexist with its gender non-identity, even though I understand Christopher's journey. And now, more than anything, I want to assert my right to exist. Yes: I fucking do exist, even if this timeline already has another version of me.

I gritted my teeth a little when Granny slid a few dollars to me before I left, aware of the fact that I was broke. I hate being pitied - especially financially - it's one of those things that sends a long shiver down my spine. But she did it saying it might help me 'buy myself a sense of style,' and behind that sharp condescension, I caught a glimpse of how my own grandmother used to express affection through food or clothes. So I didn't turn it down, and I did exactly what she suggested.

I bought myself a T-shirt featuring 'And Justice for All', the fourth studio album by Metallica.

I found it in a small vintage thrift shop; the T-shirt was printed a year before I was born. A collector's item, in perfect condition, which the seller clearly had no idea was valuable. On the fabric, 'Lady Justice' is bound and breaking, just like her scales, manipulated by external forces or controlled by powerful interests. Themes that resonate with me even more today than they did in my teenage years. It's a bit big for me, okay, but I don't care: I feel good in it, a thousand times better than in my own skin, and I clearly don't give a shit about what anyone will think.

I put it on right away and continued to wander through Argyle Park and then around the city. I walked for a long time to think, but I wasn't really able to. I stopped at the waffle shack and ate one as dinner. I was sharing my meal with the pigeons when a new wave of energy swept over The City. Thudding, relentless, similar to the one I felt at Ink Empire last night. Perhaps even more powerful. Once again, I was the only one left speechless, causing me to wonder what was wrong with me. I shook off my stupor by gently tapping my cheeks. The pigeons, however, had already vanished.