The Endless Golden Dunes

Chapter 34: The Hermit and the Flame

UMAR

  
He had finally decided that perhaps meeting the mystic wasn’t as bad as he had somewhat made it out to be.
  
The thought came to him after he had seen the others leave, all four of them. When he had said good-bye, his mind was racing as to when they would return. Perhaps in a month’s time? Umar feared it would be more than that. The one he had the most hard time saying farewell to was Abbas.
  
‘Still need to hear the voice of the mountains.’ He had said.
  
‘Well, I think we have plenty of time to do something else until that time comes,’ Umar had replied. ‘Besides, I doubt that they are as wisdomful as the desert.’
  
‘They might have some other type of wisdom. I wish to know that.’
  
Now, he was staring at Gregorios as he was in his prostration. Every time Umar tried to take a step, it seemed that some invisible force pushed him a step back, making him unable to go anywhere.
  
‘Two winds push me, but they cannot agree on anything.’ He thought.
  
He had spotted Ali coming to him, and sighed, knowing that he had brought some kind of philosophical teaching.
  
To his surprise, he had completely ignored him and went towards the much more interesting Gregorios. Ali reached the hermit who immediately recognized him and shook his head. They sat up on a rock each and quickly sparked a conversation.
  
The non-existent wind from Umar’s behind blew more and he was walking towards the two.

***
  

‘And who but Umar himself has graced us with his presence?’ Ali said, holding out his arms as if welcoming a noble.
  
‘Shut up, Ali.’ Umar replied.
  
‘Well, that is not very nice, is it?’
  
Gregorios laughed.
  
‘It seems that you two have sour relations with each other,’ he said. ‘Have I guessed correctly?’
  
‘Pardon my tongue,’ Umar swiftly apologized. ‘I have a flame inside me that tempts me into being rude.’
  
At those words, the mystic’s eyes sparked, but they were expertly concealed with a cough.
  
‘I am assuming it took you much courage to get here? Do not be surprised. Do you think I do not see you staring at me from a distance?’
  
Blood rushed to Umar’s face and he suddenly wanted to be angry. Luckily, he managed to control it and nodded sheepishly instead.
  
‘I understand why you would do something as such,’ Gregorios assured. ‘If you do want to talk, you are more than welcome to sit amongst us.’
  
Ali smiled.
  
‘Is it wise to have two people at once speaking to you?’ he asked.
  
‘I am sure it is!’ he replied. ‘After all, wisdom is like a flame, and it must spread. The more it does so, the more intensity increases. That is a good thing. Come sit with us, Umar.’
  
Umar found it surprisingly easy to become comfortable in sitting with two people who were arguably much more spiritually developed than him. He had expected a sensation of inferiority, but it was as if he was meeting regular people.
  
Gregorios’s gaze was as if it could see through all of Umar’s desires. That thought was further proven after what he said next.
  
‘You have your heart roughened, child,’ he said. ‘It has gone through many pains. Oh dear …’
  
The man fell into pondering and he turned to Ali.
  
‘Ali, I think I must prolong our regular meetings.’ He said.
  
He looked as if he wanted to argue back, but he reconsidered. He then saw what sort of weight the situation had and he nodded. After he stood up and before he went away, he whispered to Umar.
  
‘Do not resist it when your heart aches; that is no heartbreak, that is the pleas of the soul when it seeks permission from you to grow.’
  
Umar heard it all, but understood almost none of what Ali was saying. But it was too late to know as he was beginning to leave.
  
Left alone, Umar now had little idea of what to do. He felt awkward, and he daren’t look at Gregorios lest he should feel more so.
  
‘Look at me, Umar,’ came the mystic’s voice. ‘I do not want to speak to you when your mind is wandering elsewhere.’
  
Umar, with difficult, managed to turn his head towards Gregorios’s shining face. There was no smile in him now, as it was replaced by a grim and sunken face.
  
‘I sense in you a fire,’ he said. ‘This fire can easily be out of control.’
  
‘What do you mean?’
  
‘I mean that you are not in control of your body. That is a concerning matter.’
  
‘I think that I am very much in control.’
  
‘Is that so? Well, take this bread and eat it to prove such.’
  
‘Pardon?’
  
Without answering Umar’s look of perplexion, Gregorios took out a piece of bread from his coat and handed it over to Umar.
  
‘Eat it.’ He said.
  
‘I do not see how this proves–’
  
‘Just take the bread, Umar.’
  
Umar eyed him suspiciously before extending an arm to grab the food. But before he could do so, Gregorios snatched it out of his grasp.
  
‘Too slow.’ He commented.
  
‘This is not a game. You said it was a concerning matter yourself.’ Umar frowned.
  
‘Yes, I know. Take the bread.’
  
Gregorios again extended his hand which was still full of bread. Umar tried to take it but Gregorios pulled back again.
  
‘Damn you,’ Umar muttered. ‘Just give the bread!’
  
‘You need to take it in order for that to happen.’
  
Umar tried to act fast and snatch away the bread, but Gregorios was quicker. It was honestly a wonder how his aged hands were able to move so quickly.
  
‘You harami!’ Umar roared as he stood up. ‘Just give me the damned bread! To Hell with you! To Hell with your ways, to your mother, to your father, to your–!’
  
Umar abruptly stopped and clamped a hand over his mouth.
  
‘What have I said?’ Umar muffled. ‘Gregorios, I am so sorry I spoke such things.’
  
He really was. When was the last time he was this enraged? He thought that he was doing a better job at containing his temper. Gregorios had proved him wrong.
  
To his wonder, Gregorios seemed unfazed by the entire thing. He just quietly nodded.
  
‘A fire,’ he whispered. ‘It had lit you. Come sit down, Umar.’
  
Hesitantly, while murmuring more apologies, he sat down on the rock opposite to Gregorios. When he did so, the mystic seemed to be looking into him with those eyes which could see through his body. He shook his head.
  
‘The fire is there, that much is confirmed.’
  
‘But what is the fire that you speak of?’ Umar asked, still a bit shook at what he had said previously.
  
‘What I mean to say is that there is a fire in all of us, a flame that can do extraordinary things. That flame can burn enemies, and warm friends. But sometimes, the opposite may happen. It is a cruel thing, but it is true. The fire inside us cannot be contained or extinguished. It is always there, and it will always be so. What matters is how you handle that flame.’
  
‘Handle the flame? What are you talking about?’
  
‘You must learn the ways of patience, Umar. They will help you in life. Learn how to endure the hard times without losing your temper. If you are able to such a thing, then you are on your way to becoming a much better version than what you are currently.’
  
Umar looked at him curiously. For months, he had thought he had that problem, and here was Gregorios confirming it. He suddenly wanted to cry, cry because he had nearly no control over his body, over his words, and over his emotions. He was a puppet to his thoughts. They had the strings, and they swayed Umar wherever they wanted him to.
  
‘How may I control this fire?’ he asked desperately.
  
‘You must learn to endure pain, Umar. Learn how you are able to see your emotions as clear colors. The mind is an intricate place, and it will require equally complicated handling. But through the simplest of experiences, one can control the greatest of fires inside them. I recommend that you clean the stables.’
  
‘Pardon?’ Umar was suddenly taken aback.
  
‘Those stables over there.’ Gregorios pointed.
  
Umar’s eyes followed where he was pointing and saw the makeshift stable that contained about fifty horses.
  
‘You need to clean them.’ He finished.
  
‘How will that help me?’ Umar knitted his eyebrows.
  
‘You will have to clean them to find out. Return after five days and tell me of your progress.’
  
‘Can’t you just tell me?’
  
‘That will ruin the process, and I wish only the best for you.’ He smiled.
  
Umar groaned.
  
‘Fine, then. But if this does not work, I will kill you.’
  
‘You are welcome to do anything with my body if this does not work. I will not resist.’
  
Umar stood up and began walking away.
  
‘Good-bye.’ He muttered, hopeful that Gregorios might have heard it.
  
‘May God be with you.’ He heard his reply.