The Edge of Light ✔️

Chapter Eighteen

N I K O L A I

My hand rested on her bedroom door. I had been standing here for longer than I liked to admit. I could not recognize myself. When did I start being afraid of her? Afraid of the hatred, the resignation in her gaze. The numbness in her features. When did I start caring about somebody else's well-being, their happiness?

The tension had been unbearable for too long, and I was growing tired of the silence that had stretched between us. Elena had drifted so far away, becoming a shadow of the woman she once was. Watching her fade day by day, it tore at something deep inside me—something I wasn't used to feeling.

I didn't know how to fix this, but I knew I had to try. So, tonight, I decided to start small.

Standing outside her door, I knocked gently. "Elena," I called, my voice softer than usual. "I'd like you to join me for dinner."

For a moment, I heard nothing. Silence again. But then, the sound of movement—soft footsteps. The door creaked open just slightly, and her eyes peeked out, guarded and tired.

"Why?" she asked quietly, her voice devoid of any emotion.

"I want to talk," I said, trying to keep my tone even. "No guards, no threats. Just... us."

She hesitated, her eyes scanning my face for any hint of a trap. But after what felt like an eternity, she nodded slowly and closed the door to get ready.

---

An hour later, she emerged from her room dressed simply but elegantly. Her hair was pulled back loosely, and she looked as distant as ever. But at least she was here.

We sat at the dining table, the silence between us heavier than the meal in front of us. I watched her as she picked at her food, her eyes downcast, her posture tense. I wasn't used to this—this quiet distance between us. I wasn't sure how to bridge the gap, but I knew I had to try.

I cleared my throat and leaned back in my chair. "Elena," I began, my voice steady but not as cold as usual. "I know you hate this life. I know everything about it makes you miserable."

Her fork paused mid-air, but she didn't look at me.

"I never wanted you to be this unhappy," I continued. "I never wanted to see you lose yourself like this. I just... I want you to smile again. To be happy. Even if it's a little."

She finally lifted her gaze to meet mine, her eyes dull, almost lifeless. The brightness that once filled them was gone, and I hated that I was the cause of it.

"I know," I continued, leaning forward, "that running seemed like your only option. But it won't help, Elena. You're mine, whether you like it or not. And you're not going anywhere."

Her lips pressed together in a tight line, but still, she remained silent.

"I can't change what I am," I admitted, my voice dropping slightly. "But I can promise you this—I'll try my best to keep the darkness of this world away from you. I don't ever want you to feel trapped by it. I'll do whatever I can to give you some sense of normalcy, to keep the ugly sides of our life far from you."

She looked away, her shoulders tensing as she processed my words.

"It's not that simple, Nikolai," she said after a long pause. "This life... it's everywhere. You can't just hide it from me. I was born into this world, just like you."

I shook my head slightly. "I know. But that doesn't mean I can't try. I owe you that much."

She let out a soft, bitter laugh, her eyes drifting back to her plate. "It's impossible to leave this life behind."