When The Maple Leaves Freeze (Danmarch)

1- Paradise 🥀

⚠️

Trigger Warning

Viewer Discretion is Advised

Please Read With Caution

Thank You

⚠️

They always called me a problem child.

Always with a sour look, always ready to fire a harsh word, always upset.

I even once almost beat a child to death when I was seven, simply for making me upset.

I remember that day well, even twenty years later.

The adults dragged me to a secluded part of the park where no one else could hear and yelled at me for a solid ten minutes.

I was chewed out for always being so up in my friends.

I don't blame them.

And yet, one certain question stuck with me all this time.

'Why can't you just be better? Why can't you just be good? Why don't you do anything to change this?'

How am I supposed to be good when even my existence is a reminder of how horrible people can be?

How am I supposed to be good when my anger and self hatred makes me so restless that I can't do anything but react violently?

And yet it's always my fault.

Even I know that.

I'm the one who chooses to react this way.

But I'm so weak that I can't do anything about it.

I don't know how to fix this.

How am I supposed to rely on someone to fix me when I've been broken since the day I was conceived?

How am I supposed to ask for help when I know damn well that I shouldn't exist in the first place?

I don't know my father, but given what I know about my mother, i have a pretty good idea of what happened and how I came to be.

Let's just say if I ever did have the misfortune to meet him....then that day will mark my first real murder.

I don't look like my mother at all.

She has brown hair and green eyes and I have dark navy hair and orangish amber eyes.

No one in her family looks like me.

In other words, I didn't get my looks from her.

Harsh words from a relative that I heard when I was four put a thought into my head.