They Don't Believe In Us (frerard)

17- Be My Escape, Frank

Gerard's POV

*time lapse 1 month*

Yelling startles me awake from my, for once, as of recently, peaceful sleep.

The past month since 'the incident', as I call it, has only gotten worse. I've woken up at least once a week to arguments between my parents, whether it be in the morning or in the middle of the night.

All somehow related to me, of course.

Mom has been letting us stay at friends' houses over the weekends. Sometimes we'd both crash at Pete's, and he'd make it a whole get together with our group of friends, sometimes I'd go to Lindsey's, and sometimes, unsurprisingly, I went to Frank's. Only my mom knew that, though. She'd lie to my dad, as would Mikey. Dad had still abused me, none of it as bad as that first night, but I never went a day without a bruise of sorts on me somewhere on my body. I had noticed my mom had some, too. I didn't even want to think about it, it brought me to tears every time I did.

Everybody was so concerned for me. I was surpised. Even Mikey was concerned for me, but honestly, he deserves just as much concern as I'm receiving. He's still living under the same roof as Dad. I never wanted to leave mom alone with him on the weekends, but she always assured us she was fine. Which I guess is true, because he still goes out drinking every weekend.

"Get your act together or get out of this house, Donald."

I just lay in my bed listening, Mikey probably doing the exact same thing.

"Tell our son to get his act together."

"His act is together!"

"What, fucking around with other males? Older ones at that?"

"Don! Stop being immature! You know nothing about Gerard's life! Because you don't seem to care enough to actually get to know your sons better than you should!" My mom sounded so broken and tired. She looked it, too. It hurts me to see her like that.

"You know I met his fuckbuddy? At the gig bar a month ago. He's old enough to drink, Donna, did you know that? He's an adult! The relationship is fucking illegal!"

"They're allowed to love each other, Don!"

"They can't have sex, that's what I meant, by God, you know that! Why are you supportive of this?!"

"Because he's happy, for once, Don!" Mom shouted this out from the top of her lungs. Then silence. Tears had started rolling down my face a few minutes ago. Mikey just wandered into my room, I guess knowing that I had to be awake, and sat beside me on the bed.

"I was happy. Until Dad turned into this." I mumbled quietly, Mikey just nodded sympathetically. The more I thought about it, the more true I realized those words were. I had been so happy. Happier than I've ever been. I had never suffered with depression, I mean, I occasionally got bits of sadness, but it wasn't a thing that I needed to get therapy or medication for. But now I feel like Frank is more an escape to my family problems. How I feel around him drowns out how I feel at home. I'm scared at home. I can't express myself anymore at home. I can't act remotely happy at home or my dad will throw crap at me about Frank. I don't like thinking of Frank to be an escape more than my boyfriend. But that's starting to be the case. I love Frank. And that feeling is starting to be drowned by fear and a need for safety.

Before I know it, I hear footsteps making their way up the stairs. Then my dad opens the door, Mom making her way behind him, I guess to make sure he doesn't do anything.

"Are you happy?"

"D-does it look like I am?" I dare to ask.

"No- I, mean with your..." He can't even say 'boyfriend'. It hurts, majorly.