Perspective of a Lonely Hero

Origins Issue # 05: The Hobo Spider-Man and the Punk

"Okay, people. Let's start from the beginning one last time. My name is Peter B. Parker."

(A comic book with a maskless Spider-Man in a hobo jacket swinging in the air was shown, thrown onto Gwen's.)

"I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and for the last 22 years, I've been the one and only Spider-Man. I'm pretty sure you know the rest."

(A radioactive spider bites Peter B. on the wrist. Unlike Spider-Woman, this Spider-Man doesn't jump off the ledge of a tall building. Instead he sits down to read the newspaper and drink coffee. "What a day," he mutters to himself.)

"You see, I saved the city. Fell in love. I got married and saved the city some more. Maybe too much"

(Spider-Man saves the day. He kisses Mary Jane Watson upside down. He marries the redhead later on in life and a montage of him saving the city is shown.)

"My marriage got testy."

(Peter B. lays awake at night while MJ is alseep, away from him and pillows separate them.)

"Made some dicey money choices. DON'T invest in a spider themed restaurant."

(Peter B. made some dicey money choices. A spider-themed restaurant closes down for good. It was a bad investment.)

"Then like 15 years pass blah blah blah super boring."

(More flashbacks of him saving the city are shown.)

"I broke my back. A drone flew into my face."

(Spider-Man breaks his back from falling from very high at one point. A camera drone flies into his face as he swings.)

"I buried Aunt May. My wife and I split up. But I handled it like a champion!"

(Peter B. stands before the grave of his aunt. He and MJ sign the divorce papers while not looking at each other in the eyes. But they both look saddened by their choice. Peter B. moves into a different apartment and goes to sob and cry his heart out in the bathtub as the shower rains down on him as he wears his Spider-Man suit and mask.)

He did not in fact, handle it like a champion. Losing his only parental figure and then divorcing? I'd be surprised if he wasn't affected a lot like he is now.

"Cause you know what, no matter how many times I get hit, I always get back up."

(Spider-Man spends weeks, no months just laying in bed, only moving to go to the bathroom, eating, watching TV or turning off his alarm. He wasn't getting back up from these two hits that easily.)

"And I got a lot of time to reflect and work on myself. Did you know that seahorses, that they mate for life? Can you imagine a seahorse seeing another seahorse and then making it work?"

(Spider-Man watches a wildlife documentary about seahorses. To be fair, they are underrated and adorable. His mask's eye lenses reflect the seahorses on the screen in front of him.)

"She wanted kids and...and it scared me. I'm pretty sure I broke her heart."

(Peter B. stares at his phone as he calls MJ or she is the one calling. He considers what to say if he/she answers before hanging up with a heavy heart.)

"Flash forward, I'm in my apartment doing push-ups, doing ab crunches, getting strong,"

(Peter B. is doing the opposite. He is eating pizza as he removes his shirt and his flabby belly is bouncing from the action.)