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Echoes of A Clueless Being

Puisi

A collection of poems that i made in my spare time before adulthood and university... maybe if i got in.

#2am #adolescence #englishpoem #indonesianpoem #lifepoem #notheme #poem #poems #poetry #puisi #random #remaja #shortpoem #teen #unstable #unstablemind #wildthoughts

Giving Up

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by evrythe_

by evrythe_

Mom,
Since your death,
I've been slowly
losing interest in everything.

Slowly giving up,
On my grades,
my dreams,
my passions,
my future.

I don't know what to chase anymore.
Reading and watching the things I like
doesn't distract me
like it used to.
I can't seem to fill the hole you left
within me,
Even with junk and trash.
This hole is just too unfillable now.

But, it doesn't hurt like it used to,
at least not like when you're alive,
Looking at that big hole,
I feel somewhat at peace,
I'm not scared,
sad,
or angry,
kinda empty,
more numb.
Like I have accepted it all, the reality

I don't really care if anything bad
happens to me.
It doesn't matter to me,
I don't care if I die young.

I just hope that I die before
my dad and my brother,
If they die before me,
I think i will finally kill myself.
and when i die,
I hope my existence will be erase completely