The Falling Man

Chapter 17

Ethel POV

I just finished my shift at the pub. It's around 7:30 pm and I am walking home to my apartment. With the new hire arriving I was able to leave earlier than I thought and for that I was thankful. Ray stopped in while I was working and asked for a spare key to my apartment. He said so he could work on the surprise he had for me that he told me about this morning. I ended up asking Frances for hers. She didn't question it after I told her a man wanted it, quite happy for me to be "getting it in" in her words. I had not heard of the events of the black star day yet and thankfully have yet to encounter the man from the letter. Having Ray spending the night again tonight was a comfort though as I know he would keep me safe if someone were to intrude. I was quite tired after my shift so I trudge through my doorway as I open the door.

"Hello?? Ray??" I yell out as I close my front door. As I walk into my dining room area, I see the table set up nicely with candles lit and a small box on one of the plates set out. Also, a piece of paper with the word "Surprise!" written on it. "Oh shit." I mutter to myself slightly impressed. I hear the bath running quite loudly so I assume Ray is running a bath for himself not expecting me to be home so soon. "Surprise, surprise, surprise, surprise." I mutter to myself trying to come up with something quickly to surprise him with. I think of a mischievous idea in my mind and quickly run to my wardrobe. I sift through it quickly and find a black scarf, quickly wrapping it around my head and face. Before running to the kitchen. I sift through my drawers before finding a rather large kitchen knife. Hahahaha this is going to be fucking hysterical, I think to myself. The bath is still running loudly as I slowly push open the door and peak in.

Ray is laying in the bath with his back to the door, perfect. I try to contain my laughter from bursting out of me as I slowly creep forward knife in hand. "Surprise!!!!!!" I scream at the top of my lungs holding the knife up. "AHHHHH!!!!!" Ray screams as he turns around frantically in the bath. "AHHHHH!" He screams again after seeing the sight in front of him. "Ray, it's me! It's me! It's me." I yell back holding my hand out to him as I take the scarf off. "Why would you do that?! I thought I was gonna get sexually assaulted!" He yells back to me. I can't help the laugh that bursts out of me at the sight of the startled naked man in the tub. "Baby, I'm sorry. I thought you wanted a surprise. It was a fun surprise." I tell him in between cackles reaching out to him. He holds his hand to his chest, "Oh, my God, my heart. I'm shaking so bad, oh, my God." He says taking deep breaths. "Oh..." I start to say but begin laughing again, I can barely catch my breath from laughing so hard.

He groans, "Oh, my god." "Oh..." I start to say before covering my mouth with my hands trying to stop the laughs from escaping but end up wheezing and coughing from the cackling so hard. "Oh, my God. Are you okay? Is it okay? Are you—Are you okay?" He asks me, still groaning and holding his hand to his heart. "Oh, my God." He repeats slightly crumbling down into the tub. I try to hold back my laughs still but I can't help it. "Did you have a good day?" He asks me now slightly crying. I realize at this moment what I have done. This was probably a very triggering event for him because of the war he not too long ago departed from and I immediately feel terrible.

I go to embrace him. "I did, yeah. It was fine. Ray, I'm so sorry." I tell him. He starts sobbing. I feel so stupid and so bad for doing this to him. "I'm sorry. I didnt think—I didn't think about how you would react." I tell him kneeling down beside the tub. "I—I'm sorry, it was meant to be a joke." I say taking his face in my hands. "It was—it was a good joke." He says through choked sobs. I decide to climb in the tub with him, not caring about my clothes getting wet and wrap my arms around the man. "Jesus." He says taking deep breaths. "I thought you'd be later." He tells me. "Yeah, I..." I start before being interrupted by him letting out another yell and a jump. "Oh, my God!" I yell putting my hands over my face feeling absolutely terrible.

He starts sobbing again. "Oh, God. Sorry, I just think I'm still in France." He tells me through a strained voice. I take his face in my hands once more as he lets out a big sigh. "That was horrible." He tells me. I bring his forehead to mine, "It was meant to be a surprise." I tell him with a kind smile. He nods his head, "I know. Thank you. It's fine." I rub my hands through his hair pushing his wet curls from his forehead, and quickly look to the left as a couple chuckles escape. I know it's horrible but the whole situation of me doing that was quite funny to me. They quickly stop though as he starts to sob once more, quickly bringing me back to the situation and remembering it's not funny at all what I just put this poor man through. "Should I go and get us some wine?" I ask him as he just continues to cry. "Okay." I say.

I quickly change out of my damp clothes and rush back to the pub which is only a five minute walk from my apartment and grab a bottle of wine from behind the bar. I run back to my apartment and walk through the door panting. "Splashed out on a special bottle for a special..." I trail off as I see him sitting at my dining room table. The surprise paper now ripped in half, candles blown out, and table not as nicely organized.

Ray is now dressed and is sitting looking quite upset resting his chin on his fist. His brown wet curls flopping everywhere. I now notice something else on the table, underneath his other hand, it's the letter. "Ray?" I ask him. "Had to go into your wardrobe to find a towel and..." He trails off as he lets out a sigh. Taking the letter out of the envelope. "I don't want to get ahead of myself but, Shelby's, work for men that are my sworn enemy, this is a threat, a promise to do disgusting things to you beyond all measure, working for men like them, beyond dangerous, if you betray my wants and needs I will kill all with the last name Switzer." He reads out to me. I just look at him for a moment. "Why do you look so sexy?" I say with a chuckle; a weak attempt at changing the subject.

He looks at me with a serious expression. "Don't make me pull this out of you. Loving you and then reading this is painful enough." He says to me. I stare at him with my mouth slightly ajar. "Okay, sorry...But I really think that we should just put that away. Yeah, I know it's not a normal letter, but I really think we should just put it away. We can have a really good..." I say before he interrupts me. "I'm not gonna put it away..." He says looking at me like I'm crazy before I interrupt him. "No, no, I'm serious, you can sing me your songs and stuff. It will be perfect. It will be like the nights people write poetry about and it will be fun. Serious." I say with an awkward smile on my face.

We stare at eachother for a moment. Before he wipes his hands over his face and shoves the letter back in the envelope. "Don't make me..." He starts. "I love being with you." I interrupt him once more just wanting to have a good night with him. "Yeah, I know, thank you." He replies back to me sassily. "Loving you and reading this...what is happening?" He says as he slams his hand down on the letter before bringing his hands up to rest on the top of his head. We hold eachother stare for a moment before he stands up from his seat throwing the letter to the side, "The woman I came here with loves me. Well, she told me she loves me and I said we couldn't be together because I had to try...Do you want to die?" He says before moving to gather his things.

I don't know how to respond to the information he just told me and his bold question. As I don't answer he continues, "You'll never see me again. Because I don't want to die. I'll always love you but I can't be involved in this secret life you have going on. I—I don't not want to be with you, but I'm scared for you and I don't want to be scared for my own life anymore." We stare at eachother for a moment as I take in his words. "I'm gonna go pack my things up from your bedroom, but um—If I don't see you after that, goodbye." He says before heading into my bedroom and closing the door before opening it again, "Forever this time." I pull my lips into my mouth and look down as he slams the door. I stand there for a moment taking in what just happened before he comes out of the bedroom once  again and goes to the table where the locket he gave me all those years ago lays. He picks it up and turns to me before returning to my bedroom and slamming the door. Nothing can ever go right for me eh?