Love, Take it Off

ONE

It felt different. A cool breeze drifted in, mixing with the sunlight that shone perfectly onto my windowsill. The sky was bluer, lighter than the reflection of the ocean. It was different from the country I had grown up in. But one thing made the biggest difference from my point of view.

The open field had become grander and more profitable compared to when it was just an open space where we rode horses, and played.

"The rows of grapevines stretched farther than I remembered," I mumbled.

Ilang taon na ba ang nakalipas? At kailan pa naasikaso nina mumma at papa ang mga business nila rito? Isa rin ba ito sa mga napag-awayan na nila?

The vibrant green fields stretch endlessly, and the horses can now lay lazily under the sun.

My childhood home, a place filled with memories.

We're in the countryside of Rome, Italy, familiar, yet still an unfamiliar place in my life. May magbabago kaya sa sitwasyon namin ngayon kung mas pinili nina Mumma at Papa ang manirahan dito?

"Hindi mo aayusin ang gamit mo?" Zereid said, grunting.

I let out a deep sigh.

Zereid just pulled me out of my daydreams, again.

Napayuko ako nang kaonti. I've been focused on the view outside since we left the car a short while ago, completely ignoring Zereid's endless mumbling.

"Bakit pa? Saglit lang naman tayo rito." I said.

I wonder if the girl involved in this marriage feels the same way I have since we left the Philippines.

"Are you sure? Kukunin ko na 'yung space mo sa closet kung hindi mo gagamitin."

"Yeah, I'm fine. If I can't stomach the events from this unexpected plan, mas madali akong makakauwi ng Pilipinas kung nasa luggage pa rin lahat ng gamit ko." I said, continuing to stare out the view from my room.

Zereid burst into laughter. It was the kind of laugh that sounded both annoying and dismissive, and he clicked his tongue as if he found my concerns ridiculous. Kahit na nakatalikod ako, alam kong nakataas na ang dalawa niyang mga kilay.

"Huwag ka ngang nagda-drama, Reus. Mula bata ka palang alam mo na agad na ganito ang kahihinatnan ng buhay mo. To get married to someone you don't love and . . . A stranger."

His footsteps softly echoed across the floor, yet I still wasn't ready to face him.

I'm here, about to get marries, while the world continued to turn. As I gazed at the calm, green view outside, I wondered whether this tradition still existed beyond this palce. And before actually getting married, I can't help but wonder if those who are forced into marriage feel the same way I do.

Chained, as though we had been sold, and stripped of our freedom.

"Oo nga. Bakit kaya ako lang? At hindi ka nila isinama sa ganitong set-up? It's frustrating how they hold on to traditions that feel so outdated."

"Alam mong hindi papayag si Papa na wala sa atin ang makakaranas sa nangyari sa kanila ni Mumma." Zereid replied.

I let out a heavy sigh. "Porke ba ako rin ang bunso, ako rin ang gusto nilang itali sa kasal na 'to?"

"Mmm," my brother hummed. "You know, I actually pleaded with Papa noon about this. But you know what he said? He claimed he was just honoring that little wish you had when you were younger. Naalala mo pa ba? Palagi niyong binibisita ang mga lupain natin dito? Think harder. May isang araw na sinabi mo ang hiling mong 'yon."