Take My Heart... (Radiosilence, Human Au)

Recovery

Tw for vomiting lovelies
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Everything was fuzzy, it was like a layer of noise had been put over my vision as I groaned and cried out in pain.

God, my stomach, the awful feelings of my guts twisting inside me never ended.

It just kept going, until finally, after what felt like forever, I blacked out.

Nothing, there was nothing but smoke that seemed to fill my lungs as I dove deeper and deeper into the black that was my unconscious mind.

Then, once again, I woke up, slumped over the bowl of the privy.

The detriment in my stomach didn't halt, but it tumbled back a bit.

It all felt so wrong to torture me with such a thing. For disgust was the one thing I loathed through and through.

I let out a wheeze even though it was pointless, all the smoke had vanished...

I crawled my way over to the cabinet and grabbed a hand towel, propping myself up enough to get the sink running and to soak the cloth through.

I plopped back down on the floor, wet rag in hand, and began to scrub my body and clothes until my arms got a bit sore. Before deciding to just change into something other than Alastor's shirt (which he'd given me in exchange for his robe) though I was reluctant to change, I didn't want it smelling dirty for anything, and his cologne was always strong so there was a pretty good bet that the shirt would still have that smell sunken deep into it if I washed it carefully enough.

I got out of my clothes and hobbled my way over to the dresser in my bedroom, grasping on walls and things to keep me steady.

I changed into a black turtle neck and some slacks about a size too big for me but one of my favorite items for a casual day.

I splayed myself out on my bed after that, and just soaked everything in, the emotions I hadn't felt in forever, the night I'd just had, and worst of all being away from him.

It made me hurt more than a bullet to the chest ever would.

That agonizing sensation of the one you love being ripped away without a moment of hesitancy from the universe as you mutter another goodbye. The worst feeling.

Tears began to flow out of my eyes, and my attempts to hold them back were nothing but hopeless.

They started out light trickles down my cheek, but the more I thought, the more aggressive they turned falling out in short bursts of sobs.

I stayed like that for a while. A part of me feeling nothing but the tears rolling down and another part of me feeling everything that the universe could hold and then some.

Crying and crying until my eyes were more sore than my stomach.

It wasn't uncommon for me to cry like this. Just knowing I couldn't be with him. Knowing other people would hate and judge our love. It wasn't fair, it would never be...

God, I rambled like a madman sometimes.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓆏𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊

HELLO LOVELY PEOPLE!!!

DAMN THIS CHAPTER WAS SHORT IM SORRY YALL THAT WAS MY BAD (I spent most of my time playing the new DTI quest with my boyfriend and watching horror movies)

ILL MAKE NEXT WEEKS CHAPTER EXTRA LONG I SWEAR!!

These past two chapters were supposed to display how Vox's day to day life goes most times (besides the vomiting)!!!

Anyways, have a lovely rest of your day/night, drink some water, take care of yourself, and don't forget you're loved!!!

(Also credit to my amazing boyfriend for helping come up with the way events were going to happen in this chapter cuz my creative juices ran dry)