Echoes of the Pit

2 | The Pit of Her Mind

Lena sat on the edge of her bed, staring blankly at the concert poster she had pinned to her wall—the Hit Me Hard and Soft Tour. It had been a month since that unforgettable night in Detroit, and yet she felt like a piece of her had been left behind, still standing in the crowd, still caught in the glow of the stage lights.

Billie Eilish's voice echoed through her small apartment as she played the live recording on repeat, but no matter how many times she listened, it wasn't the same. There was no rumbling bass shaking the ground beneath her feet, no sea of voices singing alongside her. She missed the sweat, the pulse, the raw energy of the pit. She missed Billie. The connection they had that night wasn't something she could replicate alone, sitting in the quiet of her bedroom, screaming lyrics into the void.

Concert depression, that's what people called it online. Lena had read post after post, thread after thread about how people felt empty after seeing their favorite artists live. She hadn't understood it until now. Every time Billie's voice hit a certain note, it tugged at something deep inside her. She wanted to go back, to feel the intensity of the music in her bones. But that night in Detroit had been special—unrepeatable.

Or was it?

A week later, Lena found herself standing in front of her laptop, pacing the floor of her living room. "This is ridiculous," she muttered, pulling at the sleeves of her oversized hoodie. "You can't just chase concerts across the world. You have bills, responsibilities..." But no matter how much she tried to reason with herself, she couldn't shake the thought. Screaming Billie's lyrics in her apartment didn't compare to the rush of screaming them in the middle of a packed arena, surrounded by thousands of fans who felt exactly like she did.

She sat down and opened up Ticketmaster, almost without thinking. Scrolling through the list of Billie's upcoming shows, she knew the truth before even checking: completely sold out. Of course. It was Billie Eilish, after all. She sighed, the familiar wave of disappointment washing over her as she clicked through city after city—New York, Paris, Berlin. All gone.

But then, she saw something.

Manchester, GB – Floor Pit: Limited Tickets Available.

Her heart skipped a beat. Manchester? Lena blinked, wondering if she was imagining things. There was no way... but it was real. There were still a few pit tickets left. She stared at the screen, her fingers hovering over the "Buy" button.

Manchester. Great Britain. That was thousands of miles away. A whole ocean between her and the stage. Could she even afford that? She checked her bank account. It would be tight, but she had enough saved up from working overtime over the summer. She could make it work.

But could she really do this? The rational part of her brain screamed no. Booking a last-minute plane ticket and going to a concert alone in a foreign country was insane. Who did that? But the thought of hearing Billie's voice live again, of being in the pit, feeling that connection she craved... it was too tempting.

For hours, she debated with herself. "You're going to regret this," she whispered, pacing back and forth. "You can't just drop everything for a concert. What if it's not the same? What if you spend all this money and end up disappointed?"

But then she thought about that night in Detroit. The way Billie had looked at her, the way the music had wrapped around her like a warm embrace. The way, just for a few hours, the world had faded away, and it had been just her and Billie, sharing something magical.

Sitting back down, Lena took a deep breath. Screw it. Life was short. If she was going to regret anything, it would be not taking this chance. Not chasing the feeling that made her feel so alive.

With trembling fingers, she bought the concert ticket.

The confirmation email pinged her inbox almost instantly, and Lena stared at the screen in disbelief. She had done it. The ticket was hers. But now came the hard part—getting there.

She quickly opened another tab and searched for flights. The cost of airfare made her stomach drop, but she had already committed to this. If she was going to Manchester, she was going all the way. Lena found a flight that fit her budget, though it wasn't the most comfortable option—layovers in New York and Dublin before landing in Manchester. But it didn't matter. The thought of standing in the pit again, screaming Billie's lyrics at the top of her lungs, was all she needed to push through.

When the final confirmation email hit her inbox, reality sank in. She was really going to Manchester. Alone. For a Billie Eilish concert.

Nervous excitement flooded her as she started preparing for her trip. She researched Manchester, making sure she knew how to get around, where the best coffee shops were, and, most importantly, where the arena was. Her suitcase sat open on her bed, half-packed with concert essentials: her favorite Billie merch, comfortable shoes for the pit, and the same eyeliner she had worn in Detroit.

But in the back of her mind, doubt still lingered. What if this didn't live up to the night in Detroit? What if she had built the whole thing up too much in her head? She shook the thought away. This was an adventure, a chance to relive the magic, even if it wasn't exactly the same.

As the departure day loomed closer, Lena's nerves shifted into anticipation. She had never done something this spontaneous, this bold. But for Billie, for that connection she had felt, she knew it was worth it.

The plane ticket sat printed on her desk next to the concert confirmation. Lena smiled, her heart racing with excitement and fear. In just a few days, she would be halfway across the world, standing in another pit, waiting for Billie to walk out onto the stage.

And maybe, just maybe, she'd catch her eye again.