Hungry is the heart

Chapter 19. The cost of being

Eleanor ran until she was stopped by the wall of thorns, that functioned as Solistes door.

The branches were woven so tightly that they felt impenetrable. There was a distant heartbeat on the other side. Her fingers shot forward, as if she could reach in deep enough to find the source. When she pulled her hand back, it was covered in blood.

'Soliste,' she screamed. Tears formed in her eyes as she stared at the closed door. This was her own fault. Why did she even try? Did she really think the goddess would have any mercy because they shared a home? She had just thrown out her only protection. She was like a wolf without teeth, knocking on the hunter's door.

And the hunter answered. The branches squeaked as they moved aside. In the back of the hallway, Soliste stood. Her heart beat calmly. 'What brings you here, dear?'

Eleanor froze in the gaze of the silver eyes. A shivered crawled over her spine. She couldn't get herself to speak, but she was sure her gaze said more than any word could.

Soliste responded with a smile wide enough to expose her sharp teeth. 'Come in, you're a welcome guest.'

She slowly stepped through the branches. Goosebumps had spread across her skin. 'Sorry,' she whispered with trembling lips.

'Why would you be sorry?' Soliste walked towards her and grabbed her bloodied hand. 'What did you do?' She sounded more like a worried friend, as the force of destruction she was.

'I didn't eat.' She clenched her teeth. Solistes heart was so close. Why didn't the goddess step back?

Soliste shook her head softly. 'Dear Eleanor, why are you so afraid of being what I made you?'

'I don't know.' She looked away.

'So hungry, still so scared to give in.' Soliste pulled her into the hallway. Her touch careful, as holding a porcelain doll. She had never been this gentle before.

When Eleanor looked up, they stood in Soliste's dinner room. The table was made, but all the dishes were empty. The plants were reflected in the silverware. 'W-what do you want from me?' she heard herself ask.

'I have everything I need. And if I want more, I take it.' Soliste let go of her hand. 'So, what is it you want? Do you want me to still your hunger, or are you out for more?'

'H-how do you mean?'

'Aren't you the one who caused Daveny to lie to me? The one who seems to see right through the veil covering this place? No matter how much I test you, you remain stubborn.' The goddess placed a hand on her shoulder. 'So what are you trying to gain. Is it love, power, their hearts, or is there something else?'

She wanted everything. She wanted to eat, to take, to know and to be. Eleanors hands made fists. Was that truly what she wanted ? Or was that the monster in her? Where was her end, and it's beginning?

Her eyes met Soliste's. 'I can give you everything, make you everything. Just tell me.'

'Why?'

'Do you require a reason to take what is in front of you? The table is made, so take what is yours. Everyone else would do the same.' Soliste leaned in. Her fingers pressed against her chest.
The goddess' calm heartbeat drove her crazy. She could feel its warmth already resting in her fingers. She could taste the sweat flesh. It wanted her to take it. To welcome her unnatural hunger. She didn't need to have mercy with the two silver eyes staring at her.

Eleanor forced herself to step back. But everything wanted to push her forward. Her feet moved back slowly, as if she was floating in water. The goddess wouldn't give her anything. This was no invitation to eat at her table. This was a vicious game, a last dance with death.

'What is it you want?' Solistes voice began to lose its soft tone.

'I want to know why,' she whispered. 'That is my request.'

The goddess stepped back. The smile fleeted from her face. 'Are you sure?'

No. She wanted to take everything. Eat this world until there was nothing left. But the goddess' expressionless face was a clear warning. Everything came with a price. One she never would be able to pay. 'Yes.'

Soliste grabbed her hand again. Her grip was tight this time. 'Are you asking yourself, or did Daveny tell you to request this?'

'H-he has nothing to do with this.'

'Not any more.'

The smile that followed, made Eleanor nauseous. 'What did you do to him?'

'He is paying the price for his hunger.'

'What did you do?!' She pulled her hand back, but Soliste didn't let go. Her nails pressed into her skin.

'I gave him what he asked for.' The goddess pulled her forward. The world around them changed into a bare and foggy landscape. 'And I will do the same for you.'

Eleanor had no choice but to follow. With trembling legs, she walked to the grey world that surrounded her. In the distance she heard screams, but she couldn't find the source. Nothing in this empty space, seemed bound by time or place. Still, Soliste had no trouble navigating. Was it hunger guiding her? Did she live for their destruction? But why Daveny? He seemed to be part of Soliste. He seemed to know and understand everything. What had he done wrong? Was this about the lie, or was there more?

Thoughts came and wend like the shadows surrounded them. Pieces of souls and voices faded past them like carried by streams of water. Then the world around her cleared, revealing a meadow. Colours melted together, but the greys didn't fully leave. Yet Eleanor could see all the details. The dark shadows the trees cast and the smoke rising from the horizon. The smell of burning flesh made its way to her nose. It should have filled her with disgust, but it didn't. She looked at the goddess next to her.

Soliste's expression was cold. There was no laugh, not even in glimmer in her eyes. 'This is how war smells.' She pulled Eleanor out underneath the shadow of an oak tree and walked through the meadow, up a small hill.

Poppy's brushed past Eleanor's legs. It was a weird feeling. This world wasn't supposed to be real, but it was. When they reached the top of the slope, she noticed a small valley with houses. The buildings were engulfed in a yellow orange sea of light. Flames attacked the wood like it was a furnace. Screams followed the smoke upwards to the sky.

In the fire, Elanor could see little movements. They seemed to be of people, but she wasn't sure. They were gone before she could identify them. Their fading heartbeats felt like torture. The world shouldn't fall this quiet.

Soliste turned her back to the flames. 'There won't be any survivors.'

'Why are you doing this?'

'Me?' She paused, staring at her intensely. 'I play no part in this. Your great-grandfathers did this. The people who build that beautiful city of yours.'

'Why?' The taste of smoke filled her mouth with every breath.

'Because that is what humans are. That is what you are.'

'So you destroy them?'

'No, I turn my back when they destroy themselves.' Soliste's fingers found hers. 'Come.'