✍︎ 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞-𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧 [dark psychopath x FBI romance] | 𝟏𝟖+

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟣𝟤

ᴄʟᴀʏ

For the next hour, I march back and forth between the bathroom and the slightly closed door of Sybille's room. It takes nearly five checks to be sure that the young lady has finally fallen asleep.

The effects of the sedatives slowly wear off, and by the time the clock strikes four in the morning, I realize I am nearly sober. There's no chance of sleep now – after what happened in the bathroom an hour ago, I'm too worried to close my eyes.

The headache that was twisting my skull has subsided, replaced by the grinding cogs of thoughts sparked by Sybille's softly spoken words earlier.

'And about the meds, you can keep them; they don't affect me anyway.'

Those words, carelessly uttered just before she closed her eyes, keep turning over in my mind. What does she mean by saying the sedatives don't work on her? There's nothing to do but wait for tomorrow when Sybille will show me those medications.

I carry my laptop, notes, and documents to the kitchen and sit at the dining table. Unable to resist, I get up, take a bottle of wine from the fridge, and turn it over in my hands, evaluating my self-control.

If I only have one glass, it won't hurt.

I rub my tired eyes, sigh, and finally sit back down with a glass of red wine.

Only one glass, Clay, I remind myself.

I can't allow myself more – I have to stay vigilant for the next two months.

I open a notebook dedicated to Sybille's mental state and immediately jot down everything I've observed over the past few days. Recalling recent events, I bite my tongue in satisfaction. If not for a decade of structured Latin alphabets and intricate codes, Sybille might have deciphered my notes. She once dared to insult my work, calling it a 'little lengthy novel; – that's how she described her own mental evaluation.

A while later, I'm scribbling the same sentence over and over: *It's not me.*

I stare at the words for a moment, but the more I describe her recent state, the more I realize I have no real understanding of what that could mean.