Scott Pligrim vs The World x Reader - Scott Pilgrim and the True Hero - Volume 3

How Does This Make Sense? (Chapter 13)

"Didn't you know?" Envy questioned, smirking as Todd telekinetically threw Scott through a wall and toward an alleyway with dumpsters. "Todd's a vegan. Graduated top of his class from Vegan Academy and everything."

"And here I thought he was some kind of Conduit at first. Could you imagine? A Vegetable Conduit? Yeah, right." You snickered, looking in the direction Scott was thrown. "Oh, right. This is bad."

"I mean, anyone can become a vegan if they work at it, right?" Stephen pondered.

"Um, no." Envy answered.

"No. Ovo-lacto vegetarian, maybe." Todd corrected, his eyes and hair back to normal.

"Uh... why not?" Kim wondered, confused.

"Most people just can't take it. It's a fact of science. The main thing to know is that I'm better than most people." Todd explained, combing his hair back down.

"That's what they taught you?" Kim was skeptical.

"Hey, go ahead and get snippy, baby. If you knew the science, maybe I'd listen to a word you're saying." Todd scoffed, waving his hand as Kim flipped him off.

"What kind of science is that following? That's not even close to anything a scientist would say." You remarked, looking at Todd.

"And what science do your powers follow?" Todd countered, glaring at you.

"Natural mutation, bitch." You replied smugly, sticking out your tongue.

"Are you well?" Ramona asked as she walked over to where Scott crashed. "Scott?"

"Ughhhh..." Was Scott's only response, laying in a pile of garbage.

"Uh... hey. How does not eating dairy products give you psychic powers, anyway? I've been wondering." Stephen asked, curious.

"You know how you only use ten percent of your brain?" Todd started as he lit a cigarette.

"This is another fact of science?" Kim guessed, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, it's because the other 90 percent is filled up with curds and whey!" Todd exclaimed, blowing smoke as he did so.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" Scott shouted as Ramona helped him up.

"Maybe if you knew the science..." Todd said, rolling his eyes.

"Anyway, that's why you can't win this fight, Scott, and you'll have to give up on dating this girl." Envy concluded, her hands on her hips in a very much cocky pose.

"What?!" Ramona exclaimed, glaring at her.

"You know about all this?" Scott was shocked.

"Of course I do! I've been with Todd since I was eleven!" Envy explained.

"So... he cheated on you with me?" Ramona assumed.

"Don't be ridiculous!" Envy retorted.

"I'm not being ridiculous, I'm just trying to-" Ramona was cut off by Envy.

"I know what you're trying to do, and it won't work. Nothing will. You're finished and Todd will make sure it stays that way." Envy declared, pointing at Scott and Ramona.

"Wyenn, shouldn't you jump in or something?" Stephen turned to you.

"Oh, right." You cleared your throat, looking at Todd and Envy. "Uh... How do I put this...? Okay, you leave my friends alone, or things will get ugly fast. Easy way or hard way, your choice."

"Oh, wow, how intimidating. Did you read that off a script?" Envy mocked. "Fine. Since you were so kind as to humiliate our drummer."

"I planned on fighting you anyway, Rowe. And I don't lose." Todd declared, glaring at you. "Any last words?"