Lisa I Still Love You 《LISOO》

CHAPTER 4

Afew hours after me and my besties meet up I decided to call my boyfriend and see 8f he would like to go on a date tonight as I hadn't seen him in a while and generally missed him so much that my heart felt like it was going to burst with sadness and longing.

However as I was looking for the contact to text him another one popped up, I had searched up LOVE remembered saving his contact as this but just as I did press search instead of one contact their was two, one was him and the other was... her.

How did I forget to change the contact name I'll just do it now I guess. I clicked on her contact and immediately all our old messages filled the screen.

SEE U TOMORROW LOVE 😍

GN I LOVE YOU ❤️

WISH I WAS THERE 😭

CANT WAIT EVEN ONE MINUTE TO SEE YOU 💋

GOODNIGHT LILLY SEE YOU IN THE MORNING DONT FORGET🥰

Reading over these messages made my eyes begin to water with all the memories I missed and the girl I missed why did she leave! But no wait this is wrong I now love my boyfriend he's the best and is the only one who truly loves me no body else does and they never will.

Even if I still love lisa it would be impossible she's in Thailand and she has blocked me... wait what she hasn't ? But then why, does she not hate me anymore? Mabye I could reach out to her again and just be friends we don't have to love we can just be friends.

It may heart as one sided love but it's better than faking loving someone else who I'm not even sure properly cares for me, just as I concluded my little self talk jennie messaged me I clicked on the notification to see what she was on about this time there couldn't be much as I only saw her this morning.

                                    🖤🩷JENDUKIE🩷🖤

JEN: Jisooo guess what!!!!!!!!

JISOO: what! Is it an emergency!

JEN:Yeah I have some emergency news about rosè!!!!

JISOO:What is she alright should I come over now!!!!!

JEN:  WE ARE DATING!!!!!!

JISOO:  Omg I'm so happy for you what made you two finally get together?

JEN:..........

JISOO:  what jen you didn't!

JEN: well yeah but we were drunk so not consciously!

JISOO: I'm gonna break up with my boyfriend jen!

JEN: why you really love him

JISOO;  no I don't I still love lisa I can't forget her and it's unfair for me to be in a relationship with him when I love someone else I'm literally mentally cheating on him!!!

JEN: oh well..... are you interested in being in a relationship with lisa again?

JISOO: YES I can't get her out of my head anytime of the day.!!!

JEN: GOOD CAUSE SHES COMING TO STAY FOR A WEEK TO VISIT ROSIE!!!!

Jendukie has gone ofline

JISOO; wait what, jennie come back what do you mean she's coming back for a week!!!!

"UH JENNIE KIM YOUR SO ANNOYING!!!!" I yelled and threw my phone away onto a nearby sofa, why can't she just tell me something clearly and not drop vage hints every few minutes.
Actually ill just go to there dorm and pester them until they tell me.

Quickly I grabbed my dior bag and dashed out the dorm room door making a dash for rose and jennies. I ran the little bag on my arm swinging manically, I dashed past the tall autumn trees they were sheading their leaves. I suddenly came to a stop, this was the beautiful place I first met lisa it was autumn just like it is now and the leave fell upon my head as I made my way over to a beach where a girl had sat, lisa had sat.

I had asked if anyone was sitting there and when she shook her head I had sat down next to her, from there we were best friends untill one day, she was out drinking and had called me from the bar as I picked her up she was shouting to the crowd about how painful it was to have feelings for your best friend but it was one sided.

Suddenly I had run up to her and kissed her full on the lips and we had gone to a hotel room and had sex, we were steady for about a year after that we were dating and happy then I slipped up made a small mistake that turned big in seconds. I kissed another girl for a dare while playing truth or dare at jennies place. I remembered watching her face fall as I leaned in and her eyes sparkle with tears as our lips made contact.

I regret everything I did that day I hurt the mostnprecious person in the world and wasnt ever properly punished for it, my biggest regret should be punished, " I WANT TO DIE AND START AFRESH THIS IS TOO HARD TO LIVE WITH GUILT SO MUCH GUILT ITS UNBEARABLE JUST KILL ME ALREADY!!"  I yelled at the sky with it's grey clouds and blue patches.

"CANT YOU JUST SET ME FREE LET ME LEAVE THJS WORLD LET ME DIE IN PEACE, PLEASE J CANT DO THIS ANYMORE ITS TOO DIFFICULT TO PUT UPNTHIS CHARADE OF BEING FINE WHEN DEEP DOWN I KNOW IM NOT!" I yelled even louder asif the sky had personally offended me with its puffy candyfloss clouds and blue ocean patterns! Uh it makes me so angry it has it so easy why can't I be just like it carefree weightless guiltfree.

The sky can rain for hours upon city and towns cause floods and kill people yet it doesn't have to suffer at all it just exists there and doesn't do anything. "WHY CANT I BE LIKE THE SKY..!"  I continue yelling but I'm cut off my a hand covering my mouth.

"Shh it's alright ji just sit and remember our memories I'm sorry for leaving you like this..." a familiar warm voice says, a voice I could recognise anywhere but now it was more  mature and serious aged...