Pencils and Pool Water (Complete)

Chapter One

Hi. I'm Simon Lake and I'm in high school.

Click tap ffffft

Hey, is this thing working? I just got this camera about a week ago. 

Err... right. Okay.

I just need to tell someone about what's happening to me, and no one's ever going to find this.... So... Why the heck not? 

It started at Calvin Fritter's fifteenth birthday party, mid-July, the summer after 9th grade, so in the fall, I'd be a sophomore.

*

"Simon! What are you doing over there?" I hear laughter after that. "It's my party! I won't have anyone not having fun."

I scowl as my heart does a little clench and my stomach drops. Freaking Calvin Fritter. 

It's his birthday party, and I only came because Gwen was coming and so was Molly (of course). Molly's his sister, about a year younger, but because of her birthday she was grouped into the same year as us. I'm also here because I love him... And I can't stay away.

I lay my head back against the tree, trying to ignore the sounds of his laughter from over there, feeling a bit of bitterness inside of me. A breeze ruffles my hair. How can you be at love when you're fourteen? 

I've known I was gay, or suspected I was at least bi, since I was 12 or 13, so... Not long. But, the first week of school when I was in 7th grade, I was hanging out with Molly and Gwen, and Molly asked me to wait with her for her brother's, (I'd heard of  him, mind you, I just never met the guy- Molly and him never shared the same teacher before because they'd kill each other) football practice to be over. 

I agreed, texting my mom and everything. He wasn't quarterback, I knew that, but I don't really know anything about football. I still don't know what position he plays and how it works. 

Anyways, as soon as he took off his helmet, I was captured. He had bronze skin, shaggy caramel colored hair, and was fairly muscular for our age (I was 13... Shut up), I blushed and Gwen and Molly twittered. I shoved them and told them to shut up. I found him attractive at the time, I wasn't in love with him. 

But then, I looked up and found his eyes scanning the bleachers and he made eye contact with me- those gorgeous hazel eyes- and I felt my heart flip. 

"My brother and his goons are on their way to harass you." Startled out of my reverie, I look up and see Molly standing over me, black hair and stormy blue eyes. Molly and Calvin are only half siblings, and they look nothing alike, which honestly just adds to their stark model-like contrast. 

I look up and act like I didn't have the way Calvin looked today memorized, feigning having to search for him for a few seconds. He was pushing himself out of the pool, exhaling, making his cheeks suck in a little. I saw the muscles in his arms quiver, and his abdomen clenched. I ignored the drop in my lower stomach, and stood up. (I was very lanky for my age, so I was about a head and a half taller than everyone else, and about a head taller than Molly). 

"He wouldn't," I say. Calvin is an all-around golden boy, polite, gorgeous... Everyone adores him. He wouldn't publicly harass me.  

"You're right, I guess..." Molly says, pulling at her bikini cover. She was obviously uncomfortable in her skin- she'd shot up in height and she was developing curves. Puberty gets everyone eventually, right? Molly still isn't used to the attention she gets from guys, but she handles it so well you can hardly tell. "But Pratyn would." Pratyn is what Molly calls a jerk from our class named Paityn who is one of Calvin's closest friends.