The Messanger

"How it Goes"

I rush in to the hospital and I immediately ask the nurse for Sam's room in which she tells me. I go to her room and she looks fifty pounds lighter, I was so confused to the point where I thought I walked in the wrong room. She then opens her eyes and says softly, " Stephen, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that you have to see me like this. I'm sorry I was never honest and upfront with you from the beginning. I was afraid if I told you, you would leave me". I hold her hand as tears begin to flow down my face and I reply, " Samantha, I wouldn't love you any less if you would've told me earlier in our relationship. If anything, I would've just done more with you to create even more memories".

As I say that, Sam begins to cry herself as regret starts to consume her mind. I can see by her face that she's overthinking about something, so I grab a chair and sit by her side as I calmly stroke her hand. I kiss her hand and say, " Nothing is your fault, you didn't do no wrong. You didn't choose to have cancer, unfortunately it's something that just happens.... I want to give you something that I bought for you earlier, something to show you how deep my love goes for you". I then pull a small case out of my pocket and hand it to her, she then opens up the case and sees the ring. Her tears start to flow even more as she looks back at me as I get on one knee. I then say, " Samantha Evan, will you be my wife, my soul tie, my other half?".  Sam then wipes her face and grabs mine and pulls me in for a kiss and replies, " Yes, I thought you would never ask".

A couple days go by and I was able to get a preacher to help us read our vows. We then signed our marriage certificate to finalize everything. Ever since then, I would go and see her as much as possible whenever I had free time. Each day I would see Sam, it would look like her health is declining more and more each visit. I would always stay strong in front of her but as soon as I leave, I would break down crying in my car. It's like no matter what, I could just never keep someone good in my life. One day I came to visit her after work and I see her reading a book. I come in and give her a kiss as I ask her what she's reading, she then stops and says, " This is the Bible, a book in which I read from time to time to not only gain more wisdom of my situations but to also flush my mind on negative thoughts ".

I look down to the floor and say, " Ima be honest, I don't think God has love for someone like me. I've been through so much turmoil and trauma so far and I could never understand that if he truly loved me then why allow me to go through all of that". Sam then grabs my hand and says, " I understand it may feel as if he has no love or remorse for you but I promise that by you still being here, all of that happened for a reason. You're a very special man Stephen, you have the choice to use your story and tell it to those who are going through the same if not similar in their lives. The most high wants you to be the light that expunges the darkness, he wants you to be the farmer that herds the sheep to safety. Please Stephen do me something as my final request, please become The Messenger that the people need".

I kiss her goodnight as visiting hours are over, I get in my car and proceeded to drive home. On the way home I began to think about my life up until now and I think about how Sam is right. How I've been through so much but I'm here in the best possible position I could be in. I return to the hospital tomorrow and I can't wait to see Sam and tell her about a promotion I got at my job. I get to her room and as I stand there, a huge wave of shock waves through my body as I drop my keys. Her body is covered with a sheet and she's no longer connected to the vital machine. I
The doctor comes in and tells me, Mr.Maxwell I'm so sorry but your wife passed away earlier this morning, she fought a long and hard battle but unfortunately her body couldn't take much more. She did have this by her side when we found her".

It's her bible, and it's left on a certain page with a verse highlighted. The verse says, " But when the kindness of God our Savior, and his love toward man, appeared, not by works done in righteousness, which we did ourselves, but according to his mercy he saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, which he poured out upon us richly, through Jesus Christ our savior; that being justified by his grace , we might be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life". Tears start falling on the page as I hold the book tightly to my chest and I softly say, " Sam, thank you for everything, I love you".

A few months go by and I get home from a church event in my neighborhood, I get a knock on the door and as I open it it's a man in a suit with a briefcase. He shakes my hand and says, " Good afternoon Sir, my name is Mr. Goldsmith and I'm a lawyer that represented your late wife Mrs.Maxwell. My condolences by the way. I'm here to give you some papers to sign so you can receive all of what's in Mrs.Maxwells will". So I let him in and sign the papers, after I finished signing everything, he hands me an envelope and says, " Mr.Maxwell, I hope all good comes your way from here on out. God bless". As he leaves, I open the envelope and there's a check with a short note attached to it. I read the note and it says, " Stephen, I hope you read this note so I can tell you one last time how much I love you, I hope this money is enough for you to live out your life and spread your message. P.S. my family was a pretty wealthy one , I just chose to live a normal life". I look at the check and the check is worth five million dollars. I fall to my knees as I cry uncontrollably and say, " Thank you baby for doing so much for me, even after life. I swear I will spread my message and I will make you proud ".