𝐺𝐼𝑆𝐸𝐿𝐿𝐸

16| 𝐵 𝐴 𝐿 𝐿 𝐸 𝑇

CHAPTER 16

"because of you i have been able to know heaven without knowing death."

<3

As suspected, the seats were high up. We sat in the balcony seats on the right side of the theater in the first row. In the balcony was only Vincent and I and because of the curve of the room, our seats were slightly angled.

His seat was a little behind mine and when I sat facing toward the stage, I couldn't see him at all, which made me incredibly nervous. I don't know why but not being able to physically see him or gauge his reaction to what was happening on stage made me feel like I was going to throw up.

My stomach kept doing flips and I kept fidgeting with the sleeve of my coat. I was too nervous to take it off.

We sat there in silence in the dark theater, the only source of the light being the stage lights that illuminated the pretty dancers on stage. I always wish I had started ballet but I was never graceful enough. My movements were always too rushed and too awkward.

Tchaikovsky's music caressed my ears which did help calm my nerves, but they were still shaken which caused me to be jittery.

I had always loved classical music and did like the Swan Lake compositions but I had never seen the ballet.

I continued to fidget and when I heard Vincent clear his throat and adjust his position behind me I started to stress even more. I felt the sweat start the build up and my hands get clammy, my large coat not helping my situation.

I should take off my coat so I don't pass out.

But then he'll see my dress.

But he's sitting behind you and its dark.

But he'll see it when the lights come back on.

Gi, your about to faint.

I breathed in deeply, not taking my eyes off Odette. The dancing really was beautiful and I would be able to enjoy it more if I didn't feel like I was about to melt from anxiousness. I tried to block out the idea of Vincent perceiving me, but it was just so hard when he was right there. Right behind me.

He was seated a foot behind me but I swear it felt like his body heat was emanating off him and penetrating me full force. I clenched the program in my sweaty hands and brought it to fan myself.

It's just a simple task. I've taken off my coat in front of people a million times. Why is this time so different?

When did I care so much about how he thought I looked?

"Are you alright?" I sensed his face right behind my ear and I pursed my lips, turning my head toward him slightly and then nodding.

"Do you need water? I can get you something quickly," he whispered deeply.