HIDING HIS DAUGHTER (TAGLISH)

CHAPTER 9

ANGELA'S POV

Natapos ko na talaga ang tatlong meetings ko kanina - and to be honest, sobrang nakakapagod talaga. Akala ko dati, pagod lang talaga kapag maraming meetings sa isang araw... pero hindi lang pala 'yon. Ang hirap talaga when the people you're meeting with are Ms. Salazar and Ms. Ablian. Isang oras na meeting, parang isang taon na lumipas kasi puro questions na hindi naman relevant, puro contradicting statements, and parang lahat ng plans mong sinasabi ay wala lang sa kanila. Ubos na 'yong lakas ko sa kanila, tapos ngayon, kakababa ko lang ng kotse for my 4th meeting today - with Mr. Velazquez naman.

Half an hour ago, I was this close to cancelling everything. I had my phone out, ready to text his secretary that I couldn't make it anymore. I was so exhausted I could barely keep my eyes open, and all I wanted was to go home. Umuwi na lang ako, makikita ko pa ang anak ko. I wanted to hold my baby in my arms, kiss her chubby cheeks, and hear her little voice call me "Mommy." That's the only thing that makes all this pain worth it - not these meetings, not the money, not the company. Just her. But then I thought about all the documents I prepared, all the time I spent reviewing every single detail... sayang naman. So I pushed myself to keep going, even though every fiber of my being was screaming for rest.

"Miss Angela, this way po," sabi ni Xianna. Kitang kita ko sa mukha niya na kinakabahan siya - baka naman kasi sobrang seryoso ng mukha ko, akala niya galit ako sa kanya. Hindi naman, eh. Pagod lang talaga ako sobra. I followed her without a word. My legs felt heavy, like I was carrying weights with every step I took. The hallway was lined with glass walls, and I could see people in suits rushing around, talking on their phones like their lives depended on it. Ganito rin ako noon, I thought to myself. Rushing, working, chasing something I didn't even know I wanted.

When we walked into the conference room, I saw a large mahogany table in the center. There was a man sitting at the head of it, talking quietly to someone across from him - his secretary, I assumed. His back was to me, but I could tell he was tall; broad shoulders under a dark navy suit that looked expensive as hell. Typical, I muttered under my breath. Another rich guy who thinks money can solve everything. I straightened my blazer - even though I knew my hair was a mess from running my hands through it all day, and my lipstick was probably fading. I walked over to the empty chair across from him, pulled it out, and sat down as calmly as I could manage. I signaled to the waiter by the door for a glass of water - my throat was so dry it felt like sandpaper.

Then he turned around to look at me.

For a split second, the world stopped spinning. The air in my lungs froze. Even the sound of the waiter pouring water into a glass faded into nothing. Jaiden. It was Jaiden. SI JAIDEN PALA SI MR. VELAZQUEZ. Of all the people with the last name Velazquez in this entire industry - all the billionaires, all the tycoons - it had to be him. The man I thought I'd never see again. The man who left me when I needed him most. My hands started shaking under the table, but I clamped them together so he wouldn't notice. Bakit ikaw pa? Bakit ngayon pa?

"Good afternoon, Mr. Velazquez," sabi ko with so much sarcasm in my voice. Alam kong naramdaman niya 'yon, kasi ang tingin niya sa 'kin ay parang sinusuri ako ng mabuti - parang isang bagay na hindi niya maunawaan, parang isang problema na hindi niya alam kung paano malulutas. Hindi ako nagpatalo sa tingin niya. I stared back at him directly, a look full of resentment, like I was saying "I can't even stand to look at you right now."

"Done staring at me na ba, Mr. Velazquez?" sabi ko nang mapagtanto kong ilang segundo na kaming nagtitigan nang walang nagsasalita.

"Uh... sorry," he mumbled, and looked away from me. Marunong na pala siyang mag-sorry ngayon. Where was this man when I was crying on my kitchen floor, holding a positive pregnancy test in my hand? Where was he when I called him a hundred times. He didn't say sorry then. Now he's apologizing for staring? It meant nothing to me - absolutely nothing.

"I'm not going to beat around the bush here," I said, my voice dropping to a cold, low tone. "What do you want from me? Why did you ask me to come here?"

"I want to buy your company, Angela," he said flatly, like he was telling me the weather forecast. No emotion, no warmth - just business. Walang hiya talaga itong lalaking 'to. After leaving me and our baby all those years ago, after telling me to get rid of the child growing inside me... now he wants to buy the company. Ang kumpanyang pinaghirapan ng pamilya ko, ang kumpanyang pinaghirapan ko ding itayo mula sa wala matapos akong iwanan niya?

Pinalobo ko ang bibig ko, pinipilit kong pigilan ang galit na parang apoy na umaapoy sa loob ko. Alam kong 'to lang ang paraan para hindi ako magwala ngayon. Ayokong gumawa ng eksena, lalo na't nandito si Xianna, at ang secretary niya.

"Look - nandito ako para makipag-usap ng maayos, hindi para galitin ka," sabi niya, parang siya pa 'yong nasasaktan. Parang siya pa 'yong may karapatan sabihin 'yon sa 'kin.

"I'm not angry!" I snapped, my voice louder than I intended. I could see Xianna flinch out of the corner of my eye. "I'm not angry!" I repeated, this time through gritted teeth.

"I know you, Angela. When you puff out your cheeks like that, it means you're holding back your anger," sabi niya, then a small smirk appeared on his lips. I smirked too when I heard him -- do you even know me anymore? Do you still know how I act, how I talk, how I show my emotions? If you really knew me, why did you leave me back then?

"You don't know me anymore, Jaiden!" sabi ko louder this time, and I saw him flinch when I called him by his first name. "You don't know me anymore! I'm not the woman who loved you so much that she was willing to give everything up for you! I'm not the woman who believed in every promise you made!"

"Xianna, you can go out now. Wait for me outside," sabi ko kay Xianna who was sitting next to me, quiet and looking scared. Kitang kita ko na she was stuttering as she spoke.

"Y-yes po, Miss A-Angela," sabi niya, then she stood up and left the room. Jaiden also told his secretary to leave, so we were left alone in the conference room - two people who should've never crossed paths again.

"Did you plan this? Did you intentionally let me find out that you're Mr. Velazquez just to hurt me again?" sabi ko with anger in my voice.

"Yes," he said, his voice serious. He stood up too, so we were face to face now. "I planned it. I needed to talk to you. I needed to see you."

"Sana hindi ka na lang nagpakita, Jaiden," sabi ko nang may kasamang sarkasmo. Nakita kong pumungay ang mata niya habang nakatingin sa 'kin - parang naramdaman niya 'yong sakit na ibinigay ko sa kanya, parang unti-unting nauunawaan niya kung gaano niya ako nasaktan.

"I-is... is our b-baby still alive?" he stammered, his voice breaking. He looked like he was about to cry - like the question was physically hurting him to say.

What kind of question is that? What right do you have to ask that?

"Ang kapal ng mukha mo, Jaiden! Pagkatapos mong sabihing ipalaglag ko ang bata, pagkatapos mong iwan ako - ngayon mo lang tatanungin kung buhay siya?" sabi ko, tapos dinuro ko siya ng daliri. "Wala kang kwenta! Wala kang kwentang ama! At wag mong tawaging 'anak natin' 'yong anak ko, dahil wala kang karapatan tawagin siyang gano'n! Simula noong sinabi mong ipalaglag ko siya, simula noong tumalikod ka at umalis ka - wala ka nang karapatan sa kanya! Wala ka nang karapatan na makilala siya, wala ka nang karapatan na sabihin mong ikaw ang ama niya!"

As I spoke, I could see all the emotions crossing his face - sadness, regret, and like there was something he wanted to say but couldn't find the right words. But I didn't give in to his emotions. I can't feel sorry for him, because he didn't feel sorry for me when I needed him the most.

"You know what, Jaiden? When I found out I was pregnant, the first person I thought of was you. I thought you'd be happy, I thought we'd raise the baby together. I thought we'd finally have the family - the family we always talked about," sabi ko, and I felt tears wanting to escape my eyes. I was still trying to hold them back. "But when you said it would be better if the baby wasn't born - that's when I realized you have no heart. That's when I knew you weren't worthy of being a father."

When I finished speaking, he was silent. I could see tears in his eyes too, but he wasn't letting them fall. Parang gusto niyang sabihin ang maraming bagay, pero hindi niya mahanap ang tamang salita. But I didn't ask him anything more. I didn't give him a chance to explain. Because I know - no matter what he says, it won't change what happened. It won't take back the pain he caused me and my daughter.