I Can Fix Him (no really I can) || Rafe Cameron

Introduction

Dear Diary,

My name is Penelope Prescott, and I'm still trying to figure out who I am. Once a Pogue, now a Kook— life has become a whirlwind of confusion and exhilaration, but theres one constant: Rafe.

Rafe is like nothing I've ever known. He's intense, flawed; but he's also everything to me. People say he's trouble, but they don't see the way he's opened up parts of himself to me that I think even he keeps hidden. With him, it's like I can be more myself then I can with others, more than just a girl trying to prove myself. Rafe makes me feel seen and wanted I can barely put into words. And yeah, maybe we're a mess, but I love him. It's that simple, even when nothing else is.

Sarah has surprised me. Rafe's sister and I probably shouldn't be close, but she's more than just another Kook. She's got a strength to her, a sense of loyalty that I think we both needed. Sometimes I think she's the only one that doesn't just expect me to pick sides. She just accepts me, complications and all, which makes her one of the few people I know I can trust in both worlds.

John B. He's the kind of friend who's like family, even if he doesn't totally understand why I chose this path. He's a Pogue through and through, and sometimes it feels like we're standing on opposite shores, neither one of us quite able to cross the water. But I think that he gets that I'm still me, even if my life looks different now. I hope he does, anyway. There are days I miss that sense of belonging we had, back when I didn't have to think about what side I'm on.

Then theres JJ. I can see that he's worried, but he doesn't push. He's always been that way— Loyal, a little wild, but someone you can count on no matter what. JJ has this way of looking at things that reminds me of who i used to be, who i still am, deep down. I think he's hoping I'll find my way back to them, and maybe he doesn't realise that I never really left.

Kei keeps me grounded. She's like a piece of home, a part of that old life that feels safe. She and I used to be so close, but I can tell she's trying to understand this shift in me. We don't talk about it much, but there's a look she gives me sometimes that says everything. I want her to know that I'm still that girl, even if things have changed.

And Pope. Pope's the one who knows better than to expect things from me that I can't give. He's thoughtful, steady, and maybe that's why it's easier to be honest with him. He's always been the one to remind me of what really matters, to keep me focused on the things I don't want to lose sight of. Even though I've left the Pogue life behind, Pope reminds me that there is still a piece of me that belongs with them.

I guess that's the thing with all of them— whether they're a Pogue or a Kook, they're a part of who I am. And with Rafe... I know people don't get it, but that's okay. Because even on the hardest days, loving him still feels like the right choice.