The next morning, Cartman steeled himself, ready to tackle his latest plan. He'd spent the entire night trying to calm the storm of feelings inside him, and he was determined to make progress—somehow, anyway.
After his conversation with Stan, Cartman realized he needed some kind of advice on what to do with all of this... mess. He wasn't about to trust just anyone with this, but Craig? Craig was distant, blunt, and didn't seem to care enough about other people's business.
And he was the only person in their grade who was openly dating someone. Cartman figured if anyone could give him a clue, it would be Craig.
He spotted Craig standing by his locker, rifling through a mess of books and papers. Taking a deep breath, Cartman marched up, trying to put on his best 'I'm-in-control' face.
He slapped a hand against the row of lockers next to Craig's to get his attention.
"Hey, Craig," he said in his usual tough-guy voice, flashing a crooked grin. "I need a word with you. Alone."
Craig gave him a deadpan stare, eyebrows slightly raised. "Yeah, not interested," he said flatly, going back to his locker. "I have way better things to do than listen to whatever dumb plan you're cooking up."
Cartman's grin faltered, and he cursed under his breath. He had been prepared for Craig to be indifferent, but not this indifferent.
Desperate, he fished a ten-dollar bill out of his pocket and waved it in front of Craig's face. "Look, I'll give you ten bucks. Just five minutes, alright?"
Craig paused, eyeing the bill skeptically. After a moment's hesitation, he let out a long-suffering sigh and shut his locker with a clang. "Fine. Five minutes, and you better make it quick," he muttered, snatching the money from Cartman's hand.
Cartman led him toward the locker rooms, keeping up his confident facade as best he could. But the second the door swung shut behind them and they were alone, his whole demeanor shifted.
Gone was the tough guy act, replaced by something much more desperate and vulnerable. Cartman's shoulders slumped, and he looked at Craig with a kind of pleading he'd never shown anyone before.
"Okay, listen," he started, his voice trembling slightly. "I... I need advice. On... relationships. Like, how you make it work with someone."
Craig looked at him, blinking in surprise. He clearly hadn't been expecting this. "You... need relationship advice?" Craig repeated, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall. "Since when do you care about that stuff?"
Cartman hesitated, nervously glancing around the room as if someone else might overhear. "Just... It's complicated, alright?" He took a deep breath, looking at the floor. "I don't know how to deal with these feelings. It's like, every time I'm around him—this person—I just... I don't know. I don't know how to act, and I don't know if I'm even... doing anything right."
Craig studied him, seeming both mildly amused and genuinely curious. "Huh. Never thought I'd see the day Cartman would ask me for advice about love." He tilted his head. "So, who's the lucky guy?"
Cartman's eyes widened, and he felt his face heat up. "No—shut up, it doesn't matter who," he snapped, trying to keep his voice down. "I just... I need to know what to do. You and Tweek have been together a while, so... how do you make it work?"
Craig shrugged, glancing away in thought. "I dunno, man. Tweek and I... we didn't even know we were a 'thing' until people started, like, shipping us. We just... it happened, you know? Like we were made for each other." He said it matter-of-factly, like it was the simplest thing in the world.
Cartman felt a pang of jealousy at how easy it sounded. Craig and Tweek seemed like a perfect fit, like they hadn't even needed to try. "So what, you're saying everything just... fell into place for you?"
Craig shrugged again, looking completely unbothered. "Pretty much. Tweek and I just get each other, even when we're freaking each other out. So... maybe one day, it'll just make sense for you, too. But, like, you can't force it, or it'll just backfire. Trying to control it will mess you up, dude."
Cartman frowned, his mind swirling with more questions than he'd come in with. That couldn't be it, could it?
Was he supposed to just... let things happen and hope for the best? He wanted an answer, a strategy—something he could do. He wanted control, not this vague advice to 'wait it out.'
"Yeah, well... thanks," he muttered, feeling defeated.
But Craig was already pushing off the wall, heading for the door. "Good luck, man," he said with a casual wave, barely glancing back as he left Cartman standing alone in the locker room, lost in thought.
Cartman stared at the door long after Craig had disappeared, frustration boiling inside him. All that, and he still felt as confused as ever, maybe even more so.
Was he really supposed to just let things happen? And what if nothing ever did happen? The thought made him feel sick with worry.
Sighing, Cartman slumped against the cold metal lockers, realizing he'd have to figure this out on his own.
YOU ARE READING
Bound By A Book (KYMAN FIC)
FanfictionCartman thinks his life is going fine, and he's keeping his secret crush on Kyle out of the light. He also has a huge art hobby that he would never tell his friends because he would just get made fun of. He thinks that they, or anyone would never kn...
