Against The Tide

95: A Bold Step

"It's like he wanted to be in total control of my life," Nadia continued, her voice trembling. "The fear was so suffocating. Everytime I stepped out, whether it was to the market, a friend's place or even my family's house, he'd accuse me of seeing someone else. The accusations were relentless. I tried to understand, to reason with him, convincing myself that he was overprotective of me because he loved me so much and didn't want to lose me. But along the way, his behavior simply became unbearable for me. I couldn't stand it anymore, being accused of sleeping with other men was just too much. It destroyed my self-worth."

Najah listened, empathy written all over her face. She could almost feel Nadia's pain. It is true that we don't look like what we've been through. Nadia was outwardly composed but a shattered vessel inwardly.

"Then he started abusing me verbally, belittling me at every chance he got. He treated me with so much disrespect he wouldn't treat a child. It got to the point where he lost all his respect for me as his wife. I thought I would endure and stay with him because I didn't want a broken marriage but I couldn't when he physically abused me. It was the final straw for me. The day he beat me up was the last day I stayed in his house. I told him to either divorce me or I'd disgrace him. Of course he chose the former because he has a reputation to protect."

Najah heart pounded harder in her chest. Nadia's ordeal was far more harrowing than hers.

"And that's not all," Nadia continued, her voice low-pitched. "Throughout our five years of marriage, he blamed me for our inability to have a child. Despite medical confirmation of our fertility, he insisted that I was the reason. He even insinuated that I was preventing it because I didn't want to have a child with him."

Najah reached out and gently took Nadia's hand. "You're not alone, Nadia. Many women have been in your shoes. You're strong and you've survived. Everyday is a step towards healing. Don't let fear hold you captive. Embrace the possibility of love and trust again."

Najah shook her head. "Do you think I haven't tried to move on? To trust again? But the fear Najah. The fear of it happening all over again. "I'm terrified of letting anyone in."

"I understand," Najah replied, her tone empathetic. "It takes time, and it's okay to feel guarded. But don't let past wounds dictate your future. Make sure you don't lose a good man in the process. A man who's capable of healing your wounds and mending your broken heart. Always remember that you deserve to be happy again, and you will."

"Thank you so much, Najah. Talking to you has been therapeutic."

"You're welcome, Nadia. Why don't we meet again next week? We can maybe go for a walk. Just a chance to talk more. Remember you're not alone in this. I'm here for you, always."

•

Najah alighted from the cab and began to stroll to her house. It wasn't too far from the main road but it suddenly felt so far because she was exhausted.

From a distance, she sighted a car parked right in front of her house, then Jameel leaning against the car.

Najah felt a surge of anger bubble up within her. Just what did he want from her again?

Heaving a deep sigh to compose herself, Najah approached him.

"You're back," Jameel said, his tone flat. "I have been waiting for you."

Najah's throat tightened. "Why are you waiting for me, please? Shouldn't you be back to your wife who just gave birth?"

Jameel ignored her question, his gaze piercing. "We need to talk."

"I'm sorry," Najah said, trying to keep it respectful as much as possible. "but I don't have anything to discuss with you."

"Before we begin, where's your 'Fiance'? I thought since you don't have a car he'd become your personal driver."