since i left: paige bueckers

15. not normal

october 19 2023 (same day as last chapter)
paige's perspective

I haven't moved from my position on my bed since she left. Maybe ten minutes have passed and I've just been staring into space, trying not to let the tears fall from my eyes. I can't believe I let myself get fucked over by her. Again. I went nearly three years without worrying about her. I went nearly three years without pining over her or complaining about her to my friends. Most of my teammates had never even heard the name 'Taylor' before we started hanging out again.

I've never been able to pinpoint what it is about her that makes me lose myself. The first moment I saw her, in that stupid New York t-shirt and cross necklace, I knew I was a goner. She hadn't even said a word yet, and I knew it then. Avery knew it from the moment she sat down with us at our table.

"I've gotta go meet with one of my teachers. He wanted to go over the curriculum that I missed from last year. I'll see you tomorrow, Paige?" Taylor grabs her black backpack from beside her and slings it over her shoulder.

"Bye, New York." I smile, patting her on the arm and chewing my gum.

"Paige, no way." Avery scolds once I turn around from Taylor's gaze. "Nuh uh. Not a sophmore. And certainly not her."

"What?" I ask innocently, continuing to chomp my gum and force a confused look on my face.

"You didn't take your eyes off of her once. If I had a dollar for every time you looked her up and down, I'd be Jeff Bezos rich. You can't like her, Paige. I won't let you." Avery sternly scolds me, her hands busy opening her Doritos bag and taking a bite of one once she's done with her harangue.

"Avery, I don't know what you're talking about. We met like an hour ago. Not even you fall that fast." I hide my smirk with my hand, knowing I'm a terrible liar and not wanting to be subject to Avery's teasing.

"You're not fooling anyone, except maybe her. She looks like one of those delusional Christians." Avery chuckles at her own joke before digging back through her chip bag.

"Avery! You cannot say that." I chide, snatching her Doritos bag from her and stealing a couple, the tips of my fingers turning orange as I do.

"You could tell her you listen to "girl in red" and she'd probably think that's a Taylor Swift album." Avery continues to lecture me, and pulls the card she knows I can't help fall for. "I always tell you who I like, this is so unfair, Paige."

"Fine, I might have a little crush, but it's nothing more than that. Nothing's gonna come of it anyways. It'll be over by next week." I speak quickly, and quiet enough so the rest of the cafeteria doesn't hear my confession.

"I wouldn't bet on that last part if I were you, but thank you for telling me. Took you long enough." Avery rolls her eyes at the second part.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did me not wanting to share my personal information bother you? I'm so dearly sorry, my kind friend." I sarcastically mock, leaning down to grab my backpack and put my water bottle in the side compartment.

"It actually really did, and I appreciate your apology. Thank you, dear Paige." Avery and I both burst into laughter, almost loud enough that we don't hear the bell ring.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Avery nods, standing up and pulling her bag from beside her.

"Bye." I murmur between bites of my last Dorito.

"Hey, why is my goodbye so much worse than hers?" Avery jokes, her voice getting quieter as she walks further back into the hallway.

"Oh shut up, Ave." I giggle, earning a weird face from the freshman next to me, probably thinking I'm crazy for screaming in the halls.