The "Biggest" Fan (EN)

11.

Almost two weeks had gone by, and I still couldn't manage to get a normal amount of sleep. Today was no exception, but this time, the noise from the kitchen woke me up.

When I got downstairs, I saw Lottie having breakfast—and my mom, sitting next to her. I hadn't seen her around here in ages. She turned her head when she heard me, but kept chatting with Lottie.

"I'm not sure how many people will be there, but I hear this art show is supposed to be quite something. Definitely the kind of crowd who'd appreciate your playing," she said.

"Yeah, that'd be nice," Lottie mumbled, mouth full of cereal.

"You still remember a few pieces by Debussy, Chopin? I think it'd suit the theme," Mom continued, drumming her long, blue fingernails on the table.

"Of course. I'll think of something. Thanks, Mom." Lottie's face beamed with excitement.

"Well, the world does need to see my daughter's talent," she gushed on. "I'm also sure there'll be plenty of young artists there, who won't be able to take their eyes off you. Maybe one will catch your eye?" she teased.

Lottie gave an awkward, shy smile. "Nah, no boys needed, thanks."

"Why not?" Mom raised an eyebrow, but then her face twisted into something suspicious. "Or... Is there already someone you've got your eye on?"

Lottie crossed her arms, like she was trying to hide something, but the smile on her face gave it away. "Maybe there is..." she said, drawing it out.

I set my cereal bowl on the table with a loud noise and both of them turned, cutting off their conversation.

"You look like you haven't slept in days," Mom remarked, eyeing me.

"I'm fine," I said. "Didn't expect to see you here, that's all."

"It's my house. I can show up whenever I want," she shrugged, and technically, she was right. But she never just 'drops by' without a reason, and I'd have preferred a heads-up before being ambushed on a Thursday morning. "By the way," she added, "I wanted a word with you, too."

I sighed, already guessing what this would be about, and just kept eating my cereal, doing my best to ignore her.

"You need to start thinking about a real career. How long are you going to keep on with that ridiculous band and those shitty gigs? How many times have you even performed?" She said it all with a seriously unimpressed tone.

"That's my business. And we have a gig tomorrow, so it's not that bad," I muttered.

She let out this judgmental laugh. "Another one of those crappy shows organized by Jake, is it? You need to aim higher than your little friends."

A horrible feeling knotted in my throat, and I could feel my hands tense, starting to tremble.

"Look, I can help you, set up a real performance, get you some connections—"

"You know I'm absolutely not interested in that," I said flatly. All I wanted was to vanish from here.

"Why are you like this?" Her tone changed to frustrated and demanding. "You know, if I just made a call or two..."

"Mom, no." I put my spoon down and stopped eating. I was trying hard to mask my frustration. "I don't need your fucking help."

Mom looked far from happy, and I knew that if we kept talking, we'd only get into a pointless argument. Lottie, picking up on this, jumped into the conversation to shift the atmosphere. It always went like this. And as they drifted into discussing the latest fashion trends, I finaly found a good moment to slip out of the house.

---

"Just promise it's not some flash-mob in a grocery store," Skylar said, looking tense. Jake still hadn't told us where we were playing tomorrow. Honestly, playing in the frozen food aisle wasn't something I wanted to do either.

"I can promise that," Jake chuckled. His expression gave nothing away, but that little smirk was making us all nervous.

"It's probably an old train station," Derek muttered, more cheerful than usual. "Or worse—imagine if we had to play at some funeral home."

"Hmm, sending someone's grandma off to the afterlife with a ballad... Just what I want." I said, trying to distract myself from my bad mood. "But on the other hand, if our music brings someone to tears, that wouldn't be a bad thing, at least."

"Seriously, don't you guys trust me at all?" Jake sighed, crossing his arms. "Just trust me."

"Just trust me, bro," I mocked, trying to mimic Jake's voice. He was not impressed.

I noticed Skylar fiddling nervously with the mic. Rehearsal had been smooth so far, no reason to worry about a bad show or anything like that, but I still felt anxious. I was trying to stay focused, but my fingers were stiffer than usual, and my voice wavered a bit when I tried to sing.

For the past few days, I couldn't stop thinking about the band's future. We barely found listeners, while Harry... No matter where he went in the world, he couldn't escape his fans. And I couldn't escape seeing his endless tour updates on social media, which only made me question if I'm doing something wrong or if this life was really what I wanted.

"You good, Louis?" Skylar noticed.

"Don't worry about it, just... Personal stuff," I shook my head, trying to push all the bad thoughts away before tomorrow's concert.

She looked at me with concern but didn't ask more. Jake started to say something, but Skylar's look shut him down.

"Whatever," I said, trying to sound casual to bring back the usual vibe.

We played a bit more, and then my phone buzzed.

Lottie: Mom's gone if you're wondering, it's safe to come back.

Lottie: Sorry, didn't know she'd show up.

Me: It's all good, don't worry. Just hope I don't see her anytime soon.

Lottie: I'm sure she'll be at my concert next week... But you're still coming, right?

Me: Of course.

I swallowed hard. Looked like another difficult evening, but I'd have to tolerate it for Lottie's sake.

"Everything good?" Jake noticed my change in mood again.

"Yeah, just Lottie. She got invited to play and wanted to know if I'd come," I said, quickly explaining to satisfy his curiosity.

"Sounds interesting."

"It's at some art show. Maybe it's cool if you're into staring at scratched-up paper and pretending it's deep," I smirked, but Jake watched me, looking unsure. "It's just... I'm not thrilled to see my mom again. I don't need another lecture on how immature I am."

Jake nodded. He knew the whole situation with my mom and, well, her dislike for him and the band was no secret either. "I'd be happy to come with you. I can pretend to be super into the art and talk nonstop so she doesn't even have a chance to get a word in," he offered.

"Thanks, but you don't have to," I said, rolling my eyes, though the idea was tempting.

"But I want to," he said. "And Lottie does play beautifully."

I rolled my eyes again but wasn't in the mood to argue. Maybe having Jake around would make the night a bit more tolerable.

---

Back at home, mom indeed wasn't there anymore. Thank god. Just Lottie sprawled on the couch, watching some silly cartoon.

"There's a package for you," she said, glancing up briefly and waving her hand at a small box on the table.

"I don't remember ordering... Anything?" I said, confused.

I walked over and picked it up. For fuck's sake, it really had my full name printed right on the label.