Chapter 39: We're fucked

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A/N: Been a while, I decided Im not gonna write in episode 10 AKA Ghost Fuckers because I just dont have the motivation too. 

Y/n had just watched four interns walk into the office and go into Blitz's office, they were definitely gonna get an ear full. Y/n hadn't been around for a few weeks because he wanted to go and revisit the Morningstars and check in on the Hazbin Hotel. Millie was currently explaining how they had fought off a infestor demon when Blitz was heavily coping and he finally pulled himself out of it. Just as she finishes we here a voice.

"COME OUT. WE'VE GOT YOU SURROUNDED!" A portal opens up revealing an eye and a large mass of cloaked demons fly out. Y/n and Millie look at eachother confused.

"Employees of the illegal business I.M.P, you are here by arresting for breaking demon law. Surrender yourselves." A cloaked demon reads. Another portal conviently pops up and shows our faces.

"YOU GUYS ARE IN DEEP SHIT" Another cloaked demon shouts. Blitz blasts out of his office and dives on the table infront of loona who was playing a game on her computer. He starts trying to delete his browser history, Millie quickly speeds up the process by slamming her axe through the screen. They both nod and nigh five eachother quickly sprawling back into action. Moxxie follows Blitz carrying some paper, he trips over and spills the papers everywhere. Y/n uses his magic to get the rest of the papers out and next to the shredder. I run over and grab the disguises handing them to Millie who runs off to flush them down the toilet. Loona sets fire to the cabinet but not before taking out a photo and hiding it.

"The shredder is jammed!" Moxxie shouts as he begins to cry.

"For fucks sakes Moxxie!" Y/n snarls as he snaps his fingers lighting all the documents on fire and disintergrating them. We all dart outside and step back as spiked ball demon blasts through the window leaking some form of gas meant to incapcitate us. Blitz breaks open a window.

"Come on guys" Blitz says, his voice hoarse from the fumes as he coughs.

"Blitz they will see us" Moxxie states with a worried expression.

"Well we can either run or we can face the music" Blitz states as we all look out the window. 

Blitz carries us all to the van and jams us in the car as we use the interns as decoys chanting. "Get in the van hurry, hurry, hurry!" Blitz starts to start up the van.

"Where are we goin" Y/n askes.

"Anywhere but here... get ready for a life on the run gang" Blitz says as the van starts up and punches it and reverses straight into a lamp post. Moxxie grunts as he sits up glaring at Blitz.

"I fucking hate you *so* much Blitz" Moxxie states in a frustrated voice.

"Freeze criminals"  a hooded demons says, the police demons surrounding us and pointing pistols at us. They roughly get us out of the car. Putting us in cuffs. Since I was a much more powerful overlord, the put me on an upside down cross. Chaining me there with chains that restricted my magical powers. They drag us into the court room.

"Come on guys this is- this all just a big misunderstanding. Is this about the orphans? Because they were already sick to begin with" Blitz states in clear panic. The light shines on him signaling that he is the accused.

"SILENCE" An unmistakable voice shouts, a loud thud echoing from the demons landing. Blitz looks up in clear shock and horror. The court room lights up with candles, lava and fire.

"We are here to sentence the criminal imp, Blitzo" Satan says flaring his wings out. Blitz puts his finger up looking at Satan with wide, terrified eyes.

"Actually sir the O is..." Blitz starts but stops as Satan stands infront of him, towering over him and blowing a bit ok smoke from his nostrils into Blitz's face. "Really there, you nailed it great job" Blitz says quickly, not wanting to make Satan angry.

 "You and your crew are on trial, for stealing a powerful goetic heirloom for undocumented personal use in the mortal realm" Satan says as he gestures to Blitz then us. He turns and walks back towards his throne, taking a seat. "How do you plead" Satan says, hos voice taking on a more deep and commanding tone.

"Oh this is about the *book?*" Blitz states as he looks around. "Ha I didnt steal that thing, I mean I tried, but since when is attempting a crime illegal am I right" Blitz states trying to seem more calm and collected.

"Always" Moxxie growls through gritted teeth, as him, Y/n, Millie and Loona all glare at him.

"Point is. It was given to me okay, I was allowed to use it-" Blitz states and was probably going to say more until someone cuts in.

"LIES" A goetic demon shouts, one none of you had ever seen before. He looks at Satan. "Your honor... speaking on behalf of my aggresively attractive sister." The demon states, using a ice bridge of his creation to slide down. His comment earning a disgusted look from both Satan and Y/n. 

"I must testify that this *brutish.imp.* Was forcing himself on her husband, Stolas who... unlike a responsible and handsome goetic demon such as myself, was to weak, and ashamed to come forward about it, the poor thing." the demon says, god you already couldn't stand this sight of this guy. Not only was he arrogant piece of shit but he was so unbelievably fake.

"WHAT!?" Blitz shouts, jumping up on his table. "Hey I didn't force shit!" Blitz shouts but is cut off of a metal gag preventing him from speaking.

"This vile, hideous Imp has put his kind to shame" The goetia states as he pushes Blitz over the table causing Blitz to land on his ass. The demon looks over his shoulder at the clearly aggravated Blitz. "Comitting such horrid acts, to gain the upper hand." The demon states, clenching his fist dramatically.

"That isn't what happened!" Moxxie shouts but is quickly cut off by Satan large imposing figure.

"SILENCE!" Satan shouts, looking down at Moxxie through his four eyes, smoke billowing out of his nostrils as he breaths heavily from anger. A little lust demon beside him calms him down. Moxxie is literally shaking in fear as Satan sits back down. "Right yeah, continue" Satan says, sounding much calmer and waving his hand dismissively. The goetic demon clears his throat.

"I'd like to add your honor, that in addition to his unspeakable acts with our dear beloved stolas." The goetic demon states. 

"Wait, wait, wait, wait" A red goetic demon says. Catching everyones attention. The two have a small argument. 

"STELLA AND I, didn't want to put him through the trauma of facing his aggressor. Who might I also add... dramatic pause... PLOTTED TO HAVE HIM ASSINATED." The goetic demon shouts pointing at blitz. Blitz is screaming through his gag, the sounds muffled heavily being barely audible and uncomprehensible.  

"that wasn't him, we don't know who wanted Stolas dead, but it wasn't Blitz!" Moxxie states with his hand outstretched and slightly bewildered expression.

"Oh well then perhaps we should ask..." the goetic demon starts but trails off as he snaps his fingers and Striker rises up on a little podium thing. "The hitman himself!" The goetic demon states. We all glare daggers at Striker. Striker spits out a read as the goetic demon continues. "Wo has agreed to give us his testimony, in exchange for immunity" He finishes. Of course he had, things just had to turn out well for that slippery prick. Striker takes a few steps forward and gestures down to Blitz.

"It was him alright, paid me to kill the precious goetia to cover up what he was doing the uhh..." Striker stops as he looks down at his hands, presumably something had been written there. "Line!" Striker says as he looks up at the icy goetic demon.

"The grimoire!" The goetic demon says looking down at Striker with slight irritation.

"Yeah that" Striker says with a scowl. blitz finally manages to get the gag off.

"WHAT. LOOK IM AN ASSASSIN OKAY, if i wanted to kill Stolas... I WOULD'VE DONE IT MY FUCKIN SELF!" Blitz shouts loudily, and everyones eyes widen... god that sounded bad.

"We're gonna fucking die" Moxxie sobs.





















 

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⏰ Last updated: Jan 18 ⏰

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