Among The Dead

Chapter 9

The silence around our campfire that night grew more and more apparent as the sun set deeper into the sky, the nearby crickets taking full advantage of our lack of chatter as their song permeated the night air. The other members of my group had probably heard more of it than me, though, for it was a mere whisper in my ears compared to the screams of my thoughts.

"It's your fault he's dead, Emma! If you'd given him your crossbow, or told him that you could handle the horde yourself, he wouldn't have gotten close enough to get scratched!" the voices of my comrades accused, different scenarios running through my head as I thought back on it more and more. I knew it wasn't them, but there were so many things I could have done to make sure he could lived. I hadn't done any of them, though.

The light was dim enough that I could barely see the faces of the other people around the fire, but I wouldn't have been surprised if they blamed me for this as well. I was supposed to protect him- to protect all of them, but instead I left him in front of a horde of walkers covered in scratches while the rest of us scrambled to get away.

Despite all of these thoughts, though, I couldn't help but notice that Kathryn hadn't come back in a while. I had heard her say that she needed to go to the bathroom in between the ramblings of my furious conscience, but that was a while ago. I had thought that Ron would never let her go off on her own, but her absence from the immediate vicinity proved that that wasn't the case. Everyone else had returned from their quiet bathroom breaks and private walks some time ago, so she was the only one that could be missing.

"I'm going to go find Kathryn," I said suddenly, interrupting the definite silence that had been hanging over all of us since we'd returned without a member of our group for the first time. It was clearly affecting some more than others, but the grief and tension was palpable among us. "And since the sun's going to set soon, I might as well take first watch. Let me know who's taking second when I get back."

I wasn't quite sure where the sudden leadership had come from, but now wasn't the time to really think about that. My potentially suicidal friend was off alone in the woods somewhere, and that wasn't sitting well with me. The boys could do whatever the fuck they wanted until we got back, but until then I wasn't worrying about it. For all I cared, they could just keep sitting there and thinking to themselves.

The woods that surrounded the pitiful camp we had set up on the side of the road weren't terribly dense, but it was impossible to squeeze through the brush silently. I ignored it, though, as it scratched at the denim of my bloodstained jeans. I would hear any walkers or people coming from miles away in these woods, but what I was most worried about was Kathryn running away from me if she heard me coming. She wasn't in the greatest of mindsets right now, after all.

It was only when I considered returning to the camp to look in a different direction that the faint sound of crying drifted towards my ears. It was a quiet sob that I had only heard a couple of times before, but it was familiar enough that I didn't hesitate to head towards the sound.

I was easily able to spot Kathryn's brightly colored clothing through the thick brush, her curled up figure resting against a tall, ancient looking oak tree. Its branches stretched out wide among the other trees like protective arms, guarding the area that its roots needed to spread out and collect the nutrients that would keep it alive.

"There you are, Kat. I've been worried sick," I said softly, not wanting to startle my friend as I slipped under the canopy of the tree and sat down beside Kathryn. She hadn't moved from her curled up position, her head still buried in her knees, but her attempt to silence the sobs she had been releasing freely just moments before let me know that she knew I was there.

"Y-you should go back to camp, Emma. Just leave me alone," Kathryn sniffled, her head tilting up just enough to reveal her red face and tear filled blue eyes. I wasn't sure exactly how long she had been out here, but I wasn't going to leave her out here any longer.