How I got to date the loml

Tutoring

⚠️Mentions of self-harm ⚠️
Jack:

✨Tues, Aug 12 2025✨

It took me a while to realize that Tom wasn't at school. Wonder why. Not important tho he's an ass anyway. Today was good I wasn't bullied and I have that girl to thank she made sure Sam hadn't come over and hit me or something.

✨Wed, Aug 13 2025✨

Today is boring, so far at least. There was stupid work for math. And then for two other classes. Currently, I'm sitting at a table in the lunchroom waiting for my friends to come back from the long ass line. I can't help but glance at Tom. Still looking fine as ever. Don't mind me fangirling.

After what felt like forever my friends finally joined me at the table with their food. They begin to eat Micheal starts talking about how school food is good and he doesn't understand why people hate on it.

I get up going to the bathroom little did I know it was a bad idea. Sam was in the bathroom and when he saw me he took the opportunity to hurt me. He hit me very hard.

✨A month later, Mon Sep 15 2025✨

It has been a month of school. Some things are still pretty easy but I've been questioning my intelligence lately. I still haven't seen the supposedly shifty side of Micheal Tom told me about. I think I'm starting to develop feelings for him. Throughout the past month, I've still been getting bullied. Even tho that girl has done a good job of preventing them, they find a way. Like when she's not here or in the male restroom.

One thing I've noticed is when beating me up Tom is less brutal than last year which is good, I don't want another broken bone. Sam seems to have gotten worse tho. Markus has always been a fifty-fifty.

Home life has gotten worse as well. My parents argue a lot. John keeps hitting my mom she says she's fine but I can tell she isn't. She uses makeup to hide the bruises but I can tell she has them.

I wish I had someone to tell all of this to. I know I have friends I just... I don't know. Like I know they are here for me and that we've all gotten closer but like I feel like they are tired of hearing me rant. Are they tired of me? How can they still be here for me I'm horrible. They have to hate me how could they not!?

I run my hand through my hair and let out a shaky breath. Both Micheal and Fred look at me. We are currently in the cafeteria waiting for the first bell to ring.

"Are you okay?" asks Fred putting his hand on my shoulder. I nod my head. "Yeah, I'm fine... I-... I'm gonna go use the bathroom." I say excusing myself and getting up from my seat and walking to the restroom.

In the bathroom, I go into a stall and lock the door. I sit on the toilet. This is not ideal but it is what it is. I put my feet up as well trying not to fall
Into the toilet as I do. I roll up my pants up to my knees.

I grab my phone from my hoodie pocket and start to take the cover off. I'm careful not to let the silver blade fall to the floor or worse into the toilet. I stare at it. My eyes start to tear up.

Is this really how I'm gonna spend my morning? I guess so. I deserve this. I deserve the pain because I'm a horrible good-for-nothing waste of space. I shouldn't even be alive.

I grab the blade moving it on my skin making cat-like scratches. I can feel the sting from the cuts. I add some to the back of my leg to the front on my knees. I roll my pants back down feeling the sting all together the same feeling I get every time.

I roll up my sleeves starting with the left and then the right. I play my arms like a violin the blade acting as the bow. After a few seconds, the familiar sting fills my arms as well. This time I don't roll the sleeves down I wait watching as the cuts, not visible when first inflicted, now red lines some were bleeding a bit more than others maybe I pressed a little too hard when cutting there.