Serpent scars

Chapter 18

The restaurant was reasonably busy and this only added to my anxiety. I wonder how Mia felt after standing up to Roger and leaving. Did she feel like this, did she feel that either way the world would keep spinning weaver she moped around all day or shoved a smile on her face. I'm not sure, and in all honestly I shouldn't be focusing on her. I should be focusing on this little family I'm now apart of. I love Jamie, I'd do anything to protect him, he's Viv's little man after all. "You alright Bon?" Asks Viv. "Yeah I'm fine." I blurt out quickly in an attempt to soothe her nerves. The thought of Roger finding me keeps swerving around my thoughts. Is he mad? Silly question.

Viv eats her meal, reminding me I should probably eat too. I don't like eating, I feel gross eating. But I'll push through it for Viv. She places a hand on my thigh as she notices my leg jogging up and down beneath the table. It's an anxious behaviour I've always had ever since I was a child. I take a deep breath and ignite a conversation with Viv and Jamie. "Jamie, how are your nuggets." I say treating him like a grownup. I think he likes that. "Good Bon Bon." He says with a cheeky grin creeping across his face. I give him a suspicious smirk as he then bursts out into laughter. Viv's face paints a picture of happiness and confusion. "What have you done little man?" She asks. Once the cheeky monkey manages to catch his breath he owns up. "I-" He begins before letting out a little chuckle again. "I poured a bit of my apple duice into your drink mummy." He says before laughing again. "Oh you naughty boy!" Says Viv sarcastically making me laugh. "I guess I'm going to have to tickle you!" She leans across the table and I watch as she tickles Jamie. He cries out in laughter and I find it heart warming.

By the end of the meal Jamie is half asleep as it is way past his bed time. Viv carries him on her shoulders whilst holding my hand softly. I shove my feelings deep down and enjoy Viv's safety. All that matters right now is me, Viv and little Jamie and I must concentrate on that.

Our weekend getaway was great! It was spent with movie nights, meals out, playing with Jamie, laughing together and going on walks to explore the scenery. Jamie was not impressed when we had to leave, he through a small tantrum. This was my first moment with him where I acted as his guardian. Normally I'd let Viv deal with it but she had seemed so exhausted from our day out. I knelt down next to the screaming child and sat him down on the floor. Viv stood in the corner of the room watching me calm him. I held his hands in mine and took a few deep breaths hoping he'd mimic. This is how my mother always calmed me down, this isn't really the same though. "Jamie, I am sorry that we are leaving but it only means that we get to go home and see all your toys again. On the way back I'm sure we can stop and get some yummy food as well." Probably wasn't the best thing to say, I was kind of bribing him, but he calmed and smiled again. "Okay Bon Bon!" He said pulling his hands out of grasp to go and pack his other toys into his mini suitcase. I smiled at myself, proud of this achievement. "Well done Bon Bon." She said approaching form behind me, placing a kiss on my head. I pull her into me and return the kiss. I really love Viv.

Viv decided I could do with a small break from Jamie to just spend some alone time with her. I protested saying I'm fine but she went and found a babysitter anyway. The morning after we had arrived home in the middle of the night, there was a soft knock at the door. I went to open it to find a woman with a brunette bob cut styled in a half up half down style. Judging by her loosely fitted tie and her shirt with the top button undone, she is Sara. Sara was the woman I sort of accused Vivian of dating. Yeah... I freeze before the silence is broken by her sweet voice. "Hi." She says. "Um, hello." I say clearing my throat. Luckily before I further embarrass myself, Viv comes rushing to my rescue. "Hiya Sara." Says Viv finally dressed. "Hi Viv." "Come in." Viv gestures to the sofa and Sara takes a seat. "Saraaa." Yells Jamie running with a toy trained placed in his hand. He jumps on Sara's lap and she giggles. Viv gets the two settled before we head off to work, I'm technically still not fired. The plan is for Sara to drop off and collect Jamie from nursery today, then take him back to her house.

Lunch was good and we chatted. Viv didn't bring up any uncomfortable topics and neither did I. We just enjoyed each others company. On my day back at work I constantly had to reassure myself I was safe. Everyone knew that I had ran off with Viv and I feel somewhat ashamed. Not for being with Viv, but for being a hypocrite. I walked in my office and found my seat. Thank god Roger had build it with the intention to isolate me. I worked on my work in solitude. I wasn't scared to exit the room, I just didn't want to face the staff. Or gossipy parents for that matter.

At the end of the day it was my turn to collect Jamie from the toddler room. On the way I spotted Autumn announcing her pregnancy to a nosy parent. "Congratulations." I say walking up behind her. My voice sounds how it used to, still low but with more life. "Looks like I got out at just the right time, being a grandmother was certainty not on my 2025 bingo card." I say trying to engage in a conversation with Autumn. Truthly I don't want her to hate me, honestly I want to be friends with her. I'm not sure if she feels the same about me though. "Hmm, although I would of liked to see you in the role of the evil stepmother." She says, I want to laugh as it's a funny joke. But then again I don't want her to view me as evil. "Evil, no. Stepmother, yes. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go and collect Jamie." I say walking off.

Through the window I spot Sorscha staring at me with laser beams for eyes. For years I had given her grief about her and her wife Clodagh, and now here I am dating Viv. A few months back I had apologised for my homophobic behaviour towards her but she pushed me and I walked off. Now that I had made amends with Autumn, I had to face Sorscha. The next evening I plastered on a stone yet confident expression in order to face the Irish woman. I stood facing her with my hands placed securely on my hips as Jamie collected his things. "Do you have a problem Sorscha." I ask admitting to my curiosity about her heavy eye twitching. "For years you have given me grief about being married to a woman then at the alter last minute you run off with a woman!" She yells quietly. "What can I say, I love Viv." I say acting unbothered. "I deserve apology don't you think?" I sigh back at her. "I'm sorry for projecting any self loathing onto you over somethings I could not come to terms with yet. I'm sorry." I watch her get teary eyed after those words had spilled out my mouth. I didn't mean to overshare, I just did. Me and Jamie exit and I listen to him go on about his day on the way home.

I'm happy now.

AN: Sorry for going a couple days without updating, I do also plan though adding to my oneshot series