The (Not so amazing) adventures of Max

Twenty-Ninth Entry: When the Universe Says No

Wednesday, October 11

At this point, I'm convinced that the universe has it out for me. I made another attempt to ask Alyssa to Homecoming today, and it should have gone perfectly. I planned it out during math class, making sure I had the right moment and the right words. I wasn't going to chicken out this time. No stammering, no dry throat—just me, being as casual as possible.

Lunchtime rolled around, and there she was, sitting outside under the big oak tree with her friends. I psyched myself up, taking a deep breath, and marched over. This time, I wasn't going to let nerves get in the way.

Just as I opened my mouth to say, "Hey, Alyssa," the sky decided it was showtime. Out of nowhere, a pigeon, clearly trained by Mr. Dreadmore himself, dropped the biggest, sloppiest surprise on my head. Right on cue, Alyssa and her friends gasped, then burst into uncontrollable laughter.

I froze, not sure whether to laugh or cry. I mean, what were the odds? One in a million? I stood there for what felt like an eternity, covered in bird evidence, before I muttered, "I'll just...go wash up."

By the time I got back inside, any shred of confidence I'd had was long gone. Leo spotted me walking back to the table and nearly choked on his sandwich. "Dude, what happened to you? Did a bird mistake you for a statue?"

"Looks like Homecoming's going great already," Ben joked, shaking his head.

So, yeah, unless a miracle happens tomorrow or Friday, I'll be spending Homecoming night doing what I do best: playing video games and pretending dances don't exist.