Together At Last. | Newtmas AU

Twenty.

Thomas' POV

My dad showed up moments later, me and Newt stayed tangled together on the floor; holding each other close. "It's scary, you know." I said quietly in his ear. "We both could've died, or one of us. And I can't imagine losing you again.. It's s-scary." I breathed out. "I'm sorry that this is happening to you."

He let go of me to look at me in the eyes, we locked instantly. "It's okay, it's for the better. And Tommy?" He grabbed my hand and intertwined our fingers, "Yeah?" I whispered, looking at him worryingly. "You'll never lose me, I love you."

To be honest, everything started crashing down. After these past events, I felt different- sad, even. I started thinking and taking things in a negative way and I couldn't help that, I don't even like being sad.

"Are you sure?" I whispered sadly, tears brimmed my eyes but I held them back- I sniffed. "What?" He said, rather shocked to me. "Are you sure that you love me?" Tears started falling from my eyes onto my dried cheeks when I looked up at him once again to see the confusion on his face I realized what I said I regretted it because I know that he loves me, and these events are crashing me down and breaking me apart and- and I just don't know what to say or do anymore! every word I want to say comes out wrong and can hurt the one I love most and I just want him to be happy and safe and because of me, Thomas Anderson, he. can't. have. that.

"Oh Tommy, of course I do. I love you so, so much baby.." He said, whipping my tears away. "Why would you think I don't?" He said brokenly, my heart stopped.

"I-I don't know. I'm just starting to feel sad, hopeless, unwanted. After what your dad said." I started to shake, while Newt shook his head.

"Love, I'm nothing like my pathetic father." He said softly, running his hand down my arm for comfort. I nodded.

"I know, I know. I just don't want to hurt you." I said, standing up. "Tommy, wait! Where are you going?" He said sadly. I hate myself, what have I gotten myself into?

"Outside, to get fresh air." I said, facing away from the love of my life and heading out the door.

Once I looked back into the living with glass all over the floor and the broken boy, I saw tears streaming down his face.

It's not him, It's me. It's not his fault, It's mine.

What is happening to me? I'm ruining every chance I have to keep my love life together, and if I lose him, I'd have no one anymore. 

I have to fix this. Fix him, fix me, fix us.

-

A/N:

Heyy omg I love Seattle so much!
I'm going to California in like three days jfc I'm soo pumped

Also guys I have a great story of what happened between me and this really cute guy on my flight to Washington but I want to make in a one-shot for Thomas and Newt so be on the look for my next one-shot! (Idk when it'll be posted I've been hella busy since I got here)

I hope you guys are doing well! I miss and love you guys tonnsss 💞 you all make me very happy ☺️

See you soon, Hope ✨