toxic

taste

i wish my life wasn't like this. but life doesn't ask us what do we want or not.

i ended up crying into my enemy's arms. lando is holding me whispering sweet nothings in my ear. it's like he's not the same fuckboy.

"i hate this so much, norris" i sob in his chest.

"i know, love. life's cruel" he said patting my head.

his touch makes me somehow feel safe. protected. loved. it's painful. because i know those pair or greenish blue eyes don't fall in love with me.

his eyes and mine meet. i don't even care how wasted and fucked up i look. he's the only one that seemed to give me his attention and not lie to me.

he wipes my tears with his thumb. his touch is soft, makes me shiver.

"i don't like seeing you like this, love. you don't deserve any of this" he said putting a strand of hair behind my ear.

"it's okay, norris. i'm fine" i said looking away.

he puts a finger under my chin forcing me to look in his blue greenish eyes. "i hate to see you upset. i'd rather live sochi 2021 for 100 times on repeat than to see you like this"

i smile a bit. he always finds a moment to make me smile. he gently bops my nose. "you're so cute" he said smiling.

i bury my face in his chest. he smells like home.

_________________________________

a week passed, me and lando have decided that the cuddle and comfort thing was only one time. we're still enemies. nothing changed.

late at night, i'm in the kitchen, searching for my control pills. they help me sleep and erase the feeling of being thirsty of alcohol.

i finally find them and take one with a glass of water. it should start kicking in a few minutes.

the door opens, revealing a messy haired lando. he looks like he was in a deep sleep and his alarm just woke him up. but it's 3 am. what alarm?

i sit on the counter as i watch him getting a glass of water. i wonder if he noticed me. he doesn't look like...himself. no cockiness, no grin. just lando.

"oh, hi love. didn't see you here"

"what's up? why are you up at this hour?"

"i could ask you the same. i woke up from a nightmare"

i know lando has often nightmares about not being enough and getting hate comments.

"you alright?"

"yeah, yeah. i'll be fine"

he sits in between my legs. "can i..do something, love? please don't be scared"

i nod knowing exactly what he wants to do. he pushes my legs apart and lifts my nightgown. his fingers hang on the sides of my panties and pushes them down.

he pushes his head in between my legs, feeling myself getting wet. he kisses my inner thigh. a breath escapes my lips.

"quiet" he mutters, his breath against my core making me bite my lip.

his wet tongue enters me, making me put my hand over my mouth. "shit" i mutter against it.

he doesn't stop, but i struggle quieting myself. he's so skilled it's so good.

when he reaches the spot, i let out a whimper against my hand, feeling him suck all of me.

"you taste good, love. thank you" he said getting his head up. he gives me a kiss on the cheek and leaves.

like he didn't lick me on the counter.

like he didn't like it.