The DollHouse

Chapter Fourteen

After the initial headiness of victory, the situation changes rapidly. I expect the aggression to dissipate and for them to settle into some sort of normal society. It doesn't take me long to realise how stupid that is. How can they have a normal society when they have never been a part of one?

Nick keeps his arm around my waist as the crowd swells and drops with Lessers running around grabbing crates of unlabeled alcohol - smuggled or moonshine, I'm not sure - and dancing to music that they must have grabbed from the Guard rooms and are playing through the announcement system. He guides me to the edge of the hall and leans back against the wall. I try to push away from him, but he looks down at me with a warning glance. His look changes to a frown.

"We might need to get you out of here," he mutters.

I roll my eyes, surprised that he is suddenly treating me like I am in need of protection when he was leaving me so free before.

He smirks. Before either of us can say anymore, shouts break out in front of us. Turning, I see a fight starting in the middle of the hall. The pent up excitement that was brimming at the edges has reached tipping point. At least five people are involved in the scuffle, and this time there's blood. This is not a niggling altercation like I saw at the quarry. I feel Nick quiver, and looking up I see that his eyes are glazed with excitement, his pupils dilated. He is itching to get in on the action. I take a small step backwards, like I tried to do before until he stopped me.

He doesn't stop me this time. He spares me the briefest of glances before charging into the middle of the brawl. I watch as he knocks one of them out immediately. His punches are swift jabs, unlike the weaker throws of the other Lessers involved. It frightens me, but I can't look away.

I see a girl my age in the middle of the fight. She is giving it as good as the others despite her size. She ducks and weaves, her jabs low and quick. I see what I would become if I let that side of me take over. I press back against the wall as if it can offer me some form of security and search again for Nick. He has taken down another two by now, but others have come. On the ground beneath him lies a pile of unconscious people, their features obscured by blood and matted hair. He leaps onto a table, throws back his head and yells, the noise sounding so unlike a human it is more of a crow. He whips his head back up and grins, looking for the next person.

The fights blur in my vision until they are one mass of distorted movement. I look around, but everywhere is the same. It is a miracle that I have escaped being a target so far, with such unbridled aggression all around me.

It would be easy enough to join in. I am fit and strong. I can be like the girl, keeping low with swift jabs and a fast retreat. A change of order, Nick said. Maybe I am capable of making it out near the top.

The City has threatened for so long to capture me and relegate me to the Lesser commune where it can forever look down on me. And now, here I am, a Lesser in appearance and - if I join the fighting - in spirit, while the City has crumbled. There is no one left to look down on me. No one but myself. I feel like the City mocks me even in its ruin.

I manage to tear my gaze away and look for the exit. If I stay here, even if I live, I will lose myself. It would be such a relief to let it go and to give into the easy temptation of anger and hatred, but then the City will have won and I will lose every last vestige of the kindness to which I have been so desperately clinging. Unlike Jules, it seems I will risk death rather than have that taken away from me.

The exit is straight ahead of me. I get ready to run for it, but as I do Nick catches my eye. He looks shocked, although I can't think of a reason why he should, and with a final swing at the guy in front of him he detaches himself and runs over to me.