Francis: Look! Its the furry brokehomelesswhore whos dad left his mom for the lucky charms guy!
Atsushi: ....what do you want Francis...? (looks away shyly)
Francis: To tell you that WEIRDOS like you who dress up like animals deserve death VIA the electric chair! Right Poe?
Poe: ....yeah....sigh...(hides raccoon tail)
Kunikida: Hey! Stop that! Just because he's a furry and a worthless member of society doesnt mean you should get to judge him, we should be stoning him, not using the electric chair like someone with daddy's money! Not all of us can afford that!
Francis: Whatever, I bet you have a creature cock
Kunikida: Whats a creature cock
Dazai: Its what I'm riding tonight...I am a pole dancer though Atushi, I think its pretty much the same thing as humping random tigers in the wilderness, making them go extinct
Kunikida: Dazai go shove a rock up your ass. Here have this one (hands him a boulder)
Ranpo: And...Im an anime nerd uwu (shows his I <3 my bf Gojo shirt)
Poe: (Looks over at him and blushes)
Kunikida: Come on Dazai lets go back to the agency and shove Atsushi in a blender
Dazai: I'd love to cum!
Kunikida: (throws him into conversion camp)
Back at the agency....
Yosano: Hey Atsushi, I'm...kind of a nerd too...I experienced war crimes and was groomed by a grown ass man who showed me child porn
Atsushi: Cool, I like jerking off to tigers, I find their stripes seductive
The Next Day...
Atsushi wears his 30,000 dollar fursuit to school (and takes all the orphanages funds, so they kicked him out, now he does crystal meth)
Francis: Wow! Look at the freak (begins filming him on iPhone94)
Atushi: GRRR!!! HISS!! THIS TIGER BITES BACK!!!! LUCKILY MY FUR SUIT HAS BUILT IN TEETH!!! FOR BITING MY VICTIMS!!!! AND SUCKING AKUTAGAWA'S DICK!
(Atsushi tires to bite his ass but only finds the void)
Francis then gets rabies and his skin turns orange and his hair becomes green, and all of a sudden he wants to make chocolate
Francis: OH NO! I need to go back to making chocolate! Let me find my best bud, Timothee chalamet!
Atsushi: HAHA You're shorter than Chuuya and more orange then Chuuya and Donald J Trump combined!
At the Timothee Chalamet look-alike contest....
Hitrotsu: Wow, I can't believe I won!
Former PM Boss: DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATH DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHH PLEASE KILL ME PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!
Hitortsu: i didnt know you were a Sabrina Carpenter FAN! I love Juno Positions, Look! Dazai's cosplaying her right now!
Dazai: Whose Sabrina Carpenter, this just how I dress and how I sit (he's sitting with his legs above his head)
Former Boss: I know I have good judgement, I know I have good taste It's funny and it's ironic that only I feel that way I promise 'em that you're different and everyone makes mistakes But just don't I heard that you're an actor, so act like a stand-up guy Whatever devil's inside you, don't let him out tonight I tell them it's just your culture and everyone rolls their eyes Yeah, I know All I'm asking, baby Please, please, please don't prove I'm right Please, please, please Don't bring me to tears when I just did my makeup so nice Heartbreak is one thing, my ego's another I beg you, don't embarrass me, motherfucker, oh Please, please, please (ah) Well, I have a fun idea, babe (uh-huh), maybe just stay inside I know you're craving some fresh air But the ceiling fan is so nice (it's so nice, right?) And we could live so happily if no one knows that you're with me I'm just kidding, but really (kinda), really, really Please, please, please don't prove I'm right Please, please, please Don't bring me to tears when I just did my makeup so nice Heartbreak is one thing (heartbreak is one thing), my ego's another (ego's another) I beg you, don't embarrass me, motherfucker, (chokes to death) Please, please, please (ah) If you wanna go and be stupid, don't do it in front of me If you don't wanna cry to my music, don't make me hate you prolifically Please, please, please (please) Please, please, please (please) Please (please), please (please), please (ah)
Francis: Have any of you seen my queen Willy Wonka
Hitortsu: No
Francis: (cries)
Willy Wonka: Queen never cry
Francis: (does the face)
Francis and Willy Wonka then leave
Hitortsu: Dazai do you wanna go to the Sabrina Carpenter concert with us?
Dazai: Sure ig
At the Sabrina Carpenter Concert....
Announcer: Sabrina Carpenter will be here soon....
Then the curtain comes up and Kouyou and Sabrina Carpenter are having a threesome with Yosano in Sabrina Carpenter cosplay
GASP
Chuuya: HOW DARE YOU! SHE WAS MY FAVORITE SINGER BECAUSE I'M TALLER THAN HER!!
Dazai: CHUUYA??? YOU'RE AT THE SABRINA CARPENTER CONCERT???
Chuuya: Yeah lol
Sabrina: Sorry queens! I'll preform now!
She then begins preforming and her backup dancers, Oda's dead orphans, twerk in unison
Sabrina: Have you ever tried....this one...?
She then gets into the Juno position
Dazai: Yeah, a few times, only on Thursdays.
YOU ARE READING
Dhar Mann x BSD Collab
FanfictionEpic tales from the Dhar Mann universe but its BSD and after a certian point it stops being Dhar Mann and just becomes a fanfic Co-written with @notgrace_y
