The History of an Evil CEO

Chapter VII The Beginning of a CEO Part 3

After catching a plane and flying through the night, we landed in Finland early in the morning. The fresh northern air was a welcome change after the hustle and bustle of Paris and London. Xavier, Matteo, Esach, Eseth and I were there to close a deal with a Finnish businessman about an association for disabled children for Playtime Co. The meeting went off without a hitch; our plans to expand the toy line across Europe are moving faster than anticipated. I even started to wonder how Ludwin had managed to orchestrate all of this. For once, his foresight seemed almost admirable

Afterwards, we had some free time, so we decided to explore. We found a cozy café in Helsinki, where I had the best salmon soup I've ever had (well, yesterday I've actually never had another one). My brothers, on the other hand, quickly got bored. Esach and Eseth, true to their impulsive nature, "borrowed" the car while the rest of us stayed behind to relax and talk. An hour later, we realized they were lost. Zach and Seth had taken the car and driven aimlessly through the Finnish countryside. According to their frantic later account, they paid no attention to road signs (as usual). Before they knew it,

I wasn't really surprised, as I had warned them moments before that we were going nowhere. However, Esach and Eseth became totally insistent. As I should have anticipated, the brothers concocted their usual plan to liven things up by saying, "Let's go get something in the car," Esach nonchalantly said, jingling the keys Ludwin had entrusted to us.

And what they did seemed straight out of one of the absurd animations Esach and Eseth claimed to produce at home. They drove through the serene forests of Finland, seemingly not bothering to pay attention to the road signs as they said, "It was in Finnish, what were we supposed to do?" Esach argued later, as if ignorance of the language was an excuse.

Before they knew it, they had crossed into Soviet territory. Unbeknownst to the brothers, they had reached the Soviet-Finnish border, possibly one of the most tension-filled places in the world. The guards, dressed in severe military uniforms and armed to the teeth, stopped them instantly.

The Soviet guards interrogated them in broken English, asking questions like:

- "Why are you coming here, comrade?"

- "What is the purpose? Espionage, perhaps?"

Esach, with his characteristic mix of wit and panic, replied: "We were just sightseeing! We didn't realize we took a wrong turn near that thing called the Golden Curtain!" One guard, raising an eyebrow, muttered in Russian to his colleague: "**Очевидно шпионы, такие глупые.**" ("Obvious spies, what fools").

Eseth, meanwhile, decided that it was a good time to bring up a way out of the conversation. —"Hey, do you know if the Lenin body exhibit is still in Moscow? I'm a big fan of his work... er, not politics, but, er, beard?"

The guards were not amused and grew even angrier. When asked for identification, Esach handed them a fake business card with the words "Esach and Eseth: Extraordinary Film Geniuses." This seemed to confirm the guards' suspicions. Things escalated when one of them grabbed a nearby phone, presumably to call his superior.

Sensing danger, Esach whispered, "We're leaving."

"Now?" Eseth asked.

"Yes, now!"

They ran to the car, revving the engine before the guards could react. Tires screeched against the gravel road as the brothers sped off, leaving behind a flurry of Russian expletives. The guards gave chase in their own vehicle, but Esach managed to negotiate a series of hairpin turns through the forest. "This is like *The Great FinFi* but dumber," Eseth muttered as branches whipped past the windows.

Eventually, they reached Finnish soil and shook off their pursuers. When they reached the airport, Esach and Eseth told their story with a mix of pride and panic. "We are heroes!" Esach declared.

"You are idiots," Xavier replied, rubbing his temples.

As we boarded the plane back to the States, I couldn't help but marvel at how the brothers had turned a simple trip into a near-total diplomatic disaster. Still, their antics brought some levity to the seriousness of our work. Now, as I write this from my seat on the plane, I wonder what Ludwin will say when he hears about the "tourist trip." Something tells me Esach and Eseth won't mention the Soviet guards.