Submitting To The Devil - The Devil's Snare - Book 2

Chapter Twenty Seven

Bianca

Silence follows our swim as I climb onto the small ledge, which doesn't give much room to wiggle. Despite being underneath the rock and behind the water, it's surprisingly hot under here.

In a matter of ten or so minutes, I dry off as I sit cross-legged whilst trying not to breathe too heavily for fear I might touch Niko in any way that encourages him to believe I want anything more than to sit here beside him in this silence. It's the truth, but I don't need him knowing that just yet; after all, he has been more hands-on today, cradling my waist under the water as I disassociated while looking at the waterfall.

He allows the silence to carry around the makeshift cave for a while, and we both sit in stoic silence.

I follow the birds flying through a small opening in the falling water. I don't know what type of bird they are, but they are dancing around one another as if courting each other.

It's fascinating to watch, and for a moment, I lose myself in a strange need to be as free as those birds. I want to have the opportunity to fall in love organically. I want to give myself to someone that I chose because I can rather than be forced into a contractual marriage because I'm told to. But on the flip side, I have this man sitting beside me, willing to love me because he can. It's a mind fuck, one I'm battling internally.

Choice is not my reality—far from it. But even so, I side-glance Niko sitting beside me.

He's leaning back on his forearms now, his eyes closed—looking like a bronzed god roaming Earth's finest rendition of Mother Nature's magnificence. He truly belongs here, or at least he looks the part.

Something deep inside me calls to move over the few inches between us. It's as if my heart is calling to clutch onto any good given to me despite knowing I may well not deserve happiness.

I can almost hear it chanting to touch him, allow him in, and steal the happiness he promises to me repeatedly. He's so close; the heat of him is welcoming, yet my brain still argues against that reality—that I should be opposing our future. In honesty, there shouldn't be an argument within my mind.

Is he breaking down my walls so quickly?

Am I allowing him to?

"You're thinking far too hard; you're on your honeymoon, Bee."

"It's a holiday at best," I murmur softly; I'm not sure why I said it out loud. I didn't want him to hear it but I always make mistakes, and this one was a mammoth one.

His hand wraps around my bicep, and I'm pulled down to the floor. The bare skin of my back protests in pain as he presses me into the uneven surface with a small margin of his body weight.

One moment, I'm beside him, and then I'm underneath him. He holds himself over me as if not sure whether to fully touch me as he wants.

My breath hitches in my throat, a bubble that strangely hurts and tingles as I stare unblinkingly up at Niko with endearment pouring out of me in the hopes he'll break down the remaining bricks between us to force me to let him in.

He searches my face with dilated eyes that seemingly reach deep within my soul. He has my body moving towards his, and that brings a smirk to his face. The next few moments have me suspended in shock and horror.

Niko leans down, cupping my face in absolute silence. His lips pucker, and despite my mind screaming to scramble, I do not move. I allow him to descend, to kiss me much as I have allowed him to do many times at home.

What's worse is that I kiss him back, mould my lips to his, and move as he does, creating a kiss like nothing I've ever experienced before.

The pull of need from deep within me dictates my movements, and slowly, that voice that despises the kiss quietens down to insignificance.

I couldn't tell you how long we kiss, but it's long enough for my hands to roam Niko's body, to find their way down his waist and to settle on his buttocks. One of my legs is hooked over his, and I'm crushing his body to mine as much as he holds me to his. His fingers are laced through my hair, cradling my scalp. His other hand holds my waist so tightly you'd need a crowbar to pry his fingers from my skin.

His pure need for me screams so loud it reverberates into the cave around us.

I'm enjoying everything he's giving me, and yet that moment of reality, the moment I open my eyes, is enough of a pause for me to allow the seedlings of doubt to wrestle their way to the surface once again.

He notices; of course, he does. He's nothing if not humbly cognisant of his surroundings—of me.

He pulls back first, which I'm glad of, and he sits back up, giving me enough space to breathe and calm my shaking limbs and racing heart.

"When will you let me in fully, Bee?" He asks dejectedly.

I shrug, sitting up beside him. This time, I breathe fully, not caring that my arm brushes his as I take in a deep breath.

"It's not easy for me," I admit with a frown, forgoing the real truth. "No one's ever cared for me," I whisper.

That's only half of what I want to say; I want to admit that even my father, the man supposed to protect me against anything, never did. That my mother stood aside whilst I was abused for years because of her fear of said man that she chose to be her husband and, more importantly, my father.

"Let me care for you, Bee. You're my wife now."

"I don't trust you, Niko," I answer him with exasperation.

"That's okay. Let me teach you to trust me? Give me a chance, Bee?" He requests with an equally as quiet tone. I can hear the raw need within him. It's disheartening that I've driven the need for him to work so hard to gain anything from me when, in all honesty, he's never given me doubt that he's a caring individual.

Well, perhaps, except for bringing his blonde bimbo home.

I turn to look at him, only to find him staring right back at me.

"Trusting someone isn't within my nature," I sigh.

"We need to build trust, Bee. How else will I protect you?" He fires at me.

"I don't know," I shrug with desperation.

He sighs loudly into the cave but remains quiet, not answering my desperation. I can't say I blame him; after all, how can you help someone who doesn't want to be helped?