RIVALS | MxM MPreg

Chapter 20

A/N - I'm back! Sorry I've been gone for so long; needed some "me time" during the holidays. Thank you for understanding and sticking around :)

Landon thought he needed time—weeks, maybe months—to think things through. He couldn't afford another rash decision; impulsivity had already messed up his life when he agreed to Jackson's deal a year ago. Six weeks away from Jackson seemed like enough time to sort his thoughts like an adult, weigh the highs and lows, and focus on the Goodyear 400 race in Darlington, South Carolina. But the younger man wouldn't stop calling and texting—pleading for them to see each other at times. It became unbearable, and then one night four days after Wade left, and when he was in bed at the hotel he stayed at, Jackson had called, and something in him snapped, and an irresistible urge to hear Jackson's voice again took over.

He had answered the phone then. They had talked slowly at first like two anxious divorced couples treading on thin ice to amend their relationship, but gradually Landon relaxed and Jackson opened his big mouth again, and the conversation felt light and normal like nothing had happened. Jackson all seemed to have forgotten why Landon stopped talking to him. There was no mention of the fight, where Landon had disappeared without contact, and nothing. But Jackson had mentioned how much he had missed him. Desperation had dripped from his voice, and he begged to see him again. Landon refused because he needed more time, and although this might've upset Jackson, it didn't show in his voice.

They had talked all night that night, and when the sun rose and their conversation ended, Landon felt an emptiness consume his whole body—a strangeness he spent the whole day trying to make sense of. It wasn't until he realized it was the feeling you get when you miss somebody.

The next day he texted Jackson first. He told Jackson about all the doctor's visits, about how much he ate yet never seemed to get any fatter other than a coat of skin he had put on, and Jackson listened earnestly. They never talked about what happened that led to Landon staying at a hotel, though. When later in the night Jackson—bold as always— asked him if they were 'still a thing', Landon couldn't bring himself to say no. Just the thought of it made his throat tighten. He also couldn't bring himself to say no when Jackson pushed it and asked him if they could meet up. He asked so softly, too; softer than he typically spoke, Landon crumbled and agreed.

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They agreed to meet up on a Sunday at Venice Beach in California. Landon had been weary about people spotting them at first, but then he remembered despite his and Jackson's popularity, not everyone knew them, and it wasn't like the paparazzi constantly followed them—NASCAR drivers weren't A-list celebrities in Los Angeles. Even if someone saw them, at this point, he didn't give a damn. Sooner or later he and Jackson would need to announce their relationship to the public, followed by the pregnancy. Damn it all, no matter how many times he turned it over in his mind, it still stirred his guts to think a whole human was growing inside him.

The boardwalk buzzed with the energy of a lazy Sunday crowd—rollerskaters gliding effortlessly past, street performers drawing clusters of onlookers, and vendors hawking everything from beaded bracelets to fresh fruit smoothies. The salty tang of the ocean mixed with the faint scent of fried food wafting from a nearby snack stand, and the steady rhythm of crashing waves provided a soothing backdrop to the chaos.

Landon sat on the sidewalk overlooking the sandy expanse of Venice Beach, his elbows resting on his knees and a cream cap on his head as he tried to ease the flutter in his chest. He couldn't believe it. Jackson was turning his heart into a teenager again.

He remembered several years ago an older woman in her fifties had struck up a conversation with him at a Christmas Eve party in Florance and said she was dating a younger man in his thirties. She said the man made her feel and looked younger. Landon didn't doubt it; she had indeed looked at least forty and had radiated youthfulness. Was this what Jackson was doing to him? Making him feel younger?