Brothers

Chapter 7 - Apartments, Apartments

It took me a minute to gather my surroundings as I thought I would wake up in my room for a moment. My head my pounding and I was still on the floor.

"Oh, oops, sorry, are you OK?" A male voice asked me. I still wasn't even barely awake so I only responded with a slight moan. Then I was being sat up by someone. I opened my eyes and cleared my vision to see it was Ryan who had sat me up against the wall.

"You OK?" He asked again.

"Um, yeah, I guess." I rubbed my head which I figured he had slammed the door into.

"Why were you on the floor, and here of all places?" He sighed and closed the front door.

"I was-" I had been waiting for him but I didn't want to say I was scared. "Nothing. I don't know."

"Kate got worried when you didn't show up. We thought you were going to come to her place."

I stood and threw my blanket at the couch and returned the fake candle to it's spot on the bookshelf.

Kate. Kate got worried. Of course you didn't care a bit, did you??

"Did you mean that?" I snapped from my thoughts when Ryan spoke up.

"What? Mean what?"

"What you said yesterday... In court."

I recalled back to everything I had said about Ryan yesterday. "Oh." I bit my tongue.

"Well, did you?"

"Maybe."

"Oh come on! Give me a straight answer!"

I didn't get why he cared. "Maybe is a straight answer."

"No! I want a yes or no, did you mean everything you said about me not being there?" My chest tightened when he got specific. I felt him come up behind me so I turned around.

"Y- yes... I did." I braced myself for a slap or something but he didn't even look angry. He actually looked a bit upset.

He reached forward and ran his fingers through my hair. "Go comb your hair." He told me and then pushed past me to the couch. I felt bad going up the stairs. I had really meant what I said, yes, but maybe he was trying, he just wasn't doing enough for me to notice. Or maybe I was just selfish and I wanted him to do everything he could. I brushed my hair like he said and stayed in my room, thinking about everything he'd ever done. I just couldn't decided if he never cared like I always assumed or if he tried and I didn't notice.

He opened the door slightly and peeked in. "Hey, do you want breakfast?"

"I'll make some." I kept my eyes at the floor.

"But, I'm already making eggs."

"And I said I'll make something for myself." I shot back with a blunt tone. I attempted to push past him through the door but, being stronger, he stopped me.

"What's up with you? You've been strange since the court."

"It's because of what I said." I was still staring at the ground, avoiding eye contact.

"I never thought you wanted my attention so much."

"Ya? Well, you're the only one I have to talk to." He was right, I was acting strange. I must have been tired because I proceeded to say whatever without thinking first.

"What? What about your friends. You must have some."

I took a deep breath and tried to calm down enough to think. "No. I mean, ya! Of course I do but outside of school I never talk to them."

"You don't?" I wasn't surprised he had never noticed.

"No, I don't. I sit up here alone and play Mancala by myself all day long." I turned and looked at the wooden board with marbles scattered over it. Ryan looked surprised.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realise..."

"Don't. It's fine." I'd gotten his attention away enough to slip through his arms and down the stairs.

It got awkwardly silent while I watched Ryan make eggs. I'd given in since there was nothing else left to eat in the house really.

"Uh, I'm going to look at apartments today. Want to come?" He'd finished the eggs and handed me a plate and a fork.

"Sure." I wondered if we would take the train again. If so, where? How far were we going to live?

We ate quietly. Ryan said we were going by 12 so before noon I'd gotten into new clothes. The doorbell rang as I was putting on my sneakers. Ryan answered it and Kate was standing there, her car behind her in the driveway.

"You two ready yet?" She said in her optimistic voice.

"Yep. Come on Nick." I sighed, why had I expected anything other than being left out again?

She drove us not to far out to a large building. Inside and out it looked a bit run down but friendly.

"Hi, you must be Ryan." A woman greeted us. "I'm going to show you a nice apartment that fits your budget." Ryan and her shook hands and she led us to an elevator. 3G was the room number she had the key for. "It's one bedroom but it fits your budget nicely and you two could make it work." She had a sweet smile but it was so obviously fake, just to get us to buy it.

"It's nice." Ryan said as he looked around. "What do you think?" He asked me.

I shoved my hands into the pocket of my hoodie and looked grumpily at the floor. "I don't like it."

"Why not? It's actually pretty great."

"I don't want to move."

He sighed. "Dude we have to, you know that."

"Ya but I don't want to." The house was almost all we had left of our old life and it didn't feel right just leaving it behind like that.

"OK, I think we'll just take it." Ryan said.

"Great! Here, just get these back to me by next Thursday." She handed him a packet of papers and we left.

"Well that was fast." Kate said while she drove us back home.

"Ya, well, this is hard enough. Why not just choose the first one I see?" He joked.

"Right." She said with a laugh.