Phan - The Beginning

Chapter 1

Phil’s POV

This was it; my first ever YouTube gathering.  It was like a major milestone in my life, but back then I had no idea how much it would change it.  I felt I hadn’t been a youtuber long enough to deserve a place there, and there wouldn’t be anyone wanting to meet me, would there?  Let’s start right at the beginning…

It was a crisp December morning, as always I was feeling excited for Christmas already even though it was only the 7th.  I got on the bus to go to the train station where I would get on a train that would take me from Manchester to London.  I was feeling really nervous yet excited at the same time.  Lots of questions where running through my head… Would anyone be there? How many people would be there?  What if I get all nervous and don’t know what to say?  As you have probably guessed my tummy was a bundle of nerves.  It felt like there was something in it trying to break free, however way it could.

I was to meet PJ at the station, near the big stone pillars at the entrance.  I could feel my legs shaking as I took each step to the bus stop.  On the bus I watched each house, tree, occasional pedestrian flash past the bus as it charged its way through the busy city.  Even my favourite thing ever, the Christmas lights, seemed pointless as all I could think of was the gathering.  As if it could decide my youtubing future…

I finally got to the station and as I walked through the busy crowds I spotted PJ.  I was thankful to see a familiar face and it settled my nerves partly. 

“Hey, are you okay?” PJ asked me.

“Yeah, I guess.” I replied. “I just feel so nervous!”

PJ gave me a reassuring look.

“It’s going to be fun! Don’t worry!”

“Ok, we should go to the platform.”

We walked to the platform and waited for a while for the train.  It finally came and we got on and sat down at a table with it between us.

PJ began telling me what was going to happen and who we were going to meet.

“After we get off the train, we walk just around the corner to Hyde Park.  Hopefully, there will already be some people there, and we wait until people come and meet us and ask us things.” Explained PJ.

“But what if no-one wants to talk to me?  I’m not that well-known…” I started to feel queasy.

“Look, you’re more well-known than you think; a lot of people enjoy your videos.”

“Ok, if you really think so…” I said.

“I know so,” PJ smiled.

I smiled back, but inside I was feeling as anxious as ever.

…

We got to London, and as PJ had said we walked around the corner of the train station and through the gates of the park.  Across the park PJ must have seen someone he knew because he started waving manically. I could see two people walking towards us and I don’t know why but my throat suddenly went very dry.

“Hey! Over here!”  PJ shouted.

The two people got closer and I could see them clearly now.  I realised now why my throat had gone dry…

They guy on the right was an ordinary nice-looking guy.  But the guy on the left, wow, he was absolutely gorgeous.  He was tall, dark and handsome with chocolate brown almond shape eyes.  He was complete perfection and I couldn’t take my eyes off him.  It must have looked pretty obvious because PJ suddenly interrupted my thoughts.

“Um, Phil?”

“Uh, yeah?”

“This is Chris,” pointing to my right, “And this is Dan.” Pointing to the sex god on my left.

Dan, such a perfect name for a perfect boy.  It suited him so well.

“I’m Crabstickz on YouTube,” Chris told me.

“And I’m Danisnotonfire on YouTube.”  Dan added.

“I’m AmazingPhil on YouTube, crap name I know, haha.” I said, feeling embarrassed.

“It’s not that bad! My name really is crap because I made it when I was 14, trying to be cool and random haha.” Dan’s laugh was beautiful, and when he spoke to me, it was like he really wanted to have a conversation with me. His eyes sparkled when he laughed, I don’t think I have ever loved anyone before as much as I love Dan…

But I told myself to stop it, to get a hold of myself and start living real life because there was no way a beautiful boy like Dan was straight, and even if he was gay, he would never love me back.  I was pale, skinny and socially awkward; he was tanned, perfectly proportioned and confident.  There was no way he felt anything for me other than friendship…